Chapter 8

Sigh. I had time to write this a little last night and this afternoon. So far classes and my work schedule are crazy for the first two weeks until training for my new job is over with. Thus, writing will be a little sporadic and that makes me sad because this relaxes me and I need to do it more often. Anyway, that's my little rant for the day. Hope you guys like the chapter, it was amusing to think of and write.

Emma's POV:

For the next two weeks, miraculously I hardly saw Sidney at all. It seemed that now that we were finally okay with each other again, we both split off in different directions. Now, things were sort of back to how they used to be- largely Sidney and I never seeing each other except for when I watched the Pens games, but that didn't count because I was watching him. The Pens were advancing into the playoffs now and both of our busy schedules prevented me from even to running into him or any of the other guys.

Mostly I had been too distracted with the CPP to care that much. That combined with helping Vero start to plan her wedding kept me more than busy and didn't leave me with much time to think about anything else.

"So you're sure that you can make it this Friday night?" Vero had called to ask me this question 3 times already and now she was just bordering on being neurotic about this.

"Vero, I already said that I'd be there. 6pm, right?" She wanted my opinion on bridesmaids dresses and colors and Friday night was the only night that worked for both of us this weekend.

"Yep, just wanted to make sure that you remembered!" she chirped excitedly. Her excitement was the only thing keeping me going at this point just because she was so happy and I didn't want to ruin that happiness by snapping at her for calling me multiple times to remind me of the same appointment.

By Friday afternoon, this was the new mantra playing over and over again in my head. She's happy, don't spoil it with your crappy mood. The bells above the door of the dress shop jingled merrily as I entered spotting Vero rummaging around racks of dress samples.

"Hey! You're here!" she said rushing over to give me a hug. "I've been waiting for you because we need a model."

We? What did she mean by 'we'? Suddenly, I spotted Sidney sitting in the chairs by the changing room and mirror looking terribly out of place in his jeans and typical Reebok sweatshirt and hat. Of course.

"Uh, hi" I said waving awkwardly to him.

"Would you mind trying these on?" Vero asked practically shoving me into the dressing room with a pile of different dresses. Great, now not only was I Vero's personal bridesmaid doll, but I now had to humiliate myself in front of Sidney while doing it. I changed quickly into the first dress and maneuvered the zipper up, grateful that it was a relatively low back and was easy to zipper by myself.

"Okay, this is the first one" I said stepping out of the dressing room and out onto the podium so that she could see the dress all around. As much as I dreaded seeing myself in it, I decided that I didn't look half bad. After years of experience going to stuffy galas with my parents, I had grown to hate formal wear and had always felt ridiculously uncomfortable wearing it. I simply wasn't made to look elegant but this dress almost made me forget that.

It was floor length with a little train in the back and a sweetheart neckline and simple back. It cinched in tightly at the waist while the material bunched and flowed out gracefully beneath it. It almost made me look like I had a butt which made me very happy indeed.

"So what do you think?" I asked Vero feeling nervous about this in front of Sidney. Just because I thought that I looked good, didn't mean that it was flattering to other people. Purposefully, I avoided his gaze and concentrated on Vero.

"This one looks really, really good. I think that a lot of the other girls will like the design of it too. It's definitely an option." She said smiling and adjusting the dress a little bit. "What do you think Sidney? You're our male perspective on this."

That sort of explained why he was here. I thought that he hated wedding stuff and I wondered what Vero had to do/say in order to get him here on a Friday night during one odd night off in the first round of the playoffs.

"It looks really good" he said to Vero. He wasn't looking at me and I couldn't read his expression at all. He sounded like he would say that even if I was wearing a burlap sack- meaning, he wasn't really concentrating on this at all. He's probably thinking about hockey even as we speak.

"I agree, it makes your boobs look so awesome!" Vero said adjusting the neckline even more to push my boobs up. I was starting to feel like I wouldn't be able to breathe in this dress, and not just because of how embarrassed I was in that moment.

The next dress was ridiculously poofy and Vero took pity on me and ordered me to change right away.

"Okay, so dress number 507 is officially on" I said coming out of the dressing room. "Where did she go?" I asked Sidney noticing that Vero had gone missing in the 60 seconds it had taken me to change and put on another dress. I needed her to come back and help me zip this specific dress up. The zipper in the back was in a little bit of an awkward place on my back that my arms couldn't twist and reach.

"She's looking at more color options" Sidney said still not really looking me in the eye. I really needed the dress zipped up so that I could come out and not stand half in and half out of the dressing room awkwardly.

"Uh, would you mind?" I said gesturing to the dress. I didn't see another option at this point and was starting to get cold. He looked at me confused for a second before understanding my meaning.

He motioned for me to turn around and I instantly felt the warmth of his hand as he pulled the zipper up and into place. I ignored the fact that his fingers had accidentally brushed against my skin and stepped forward onto the podium so that I could see the dress in action.

"I look like a cupcake" I said thinking out loud. This particular dress bunched out from the waist and had taffeta. Lots and lots of taffeta.

"Oh, I don't know. I think one of the dresses from before was a lot worse. You looked like a puff pastry."

Despite the apparent insult within that statement, I laughed noting that he smiled also. "I can't believe that you've actually been paying attention all of this time. I thought that maybe you were sleeping with your eyes open."

"No. But believe me, it's been tempting." As he said this, I noticed that he did look tired. More exhausted than was usual for him.

"How did she get you to come then?" I asked finally speaking what I had been wondering about all night.

"Well, she said she needed a guy's opinion on this and bugged me about it all week because I'm Marc's best man. She sounded so excited about all of this that I felt bad saying no. Not to mention her being upset about anything throws Flower's game off. I can't have that right now."

Ah of course. Eventually everything always comes back to hockey for Sidney. But still, in a twisted, semi-selfish sort of way, it was nice of him to be here.

"Okay guys, I think I found a good color. Em, what do you think of this one?" Vero held the sage green up to my face looking beyond excited at this point.

"I think it will look nice with your hair" Sidney said surprising all of us by willingly giving his opinion. Also, was that a compliment in there?

"Aw yeah. I think that this kind of green looks nice on anyone anyway. Oh Em, you would look gorgeous in that first dress you tried on in this color. I think that might be the one that I end up going with."

She made me try on two other dresses and finally the first one all over again before finally letting me change back into the clothes that I had worn to the shop.

"So am I done being your Barbie doll?" I asked emerging in my plain dress pants and oxford blouse.

"Vero ran off again" Sidney stated looking uncomfortable in the small waiting chairs they had circling the dressing area. He was way too big for the petite, boutique chairs.

"But I thought that we were done" I whined taking a seat with him. I chose not to sit next to him knowing that the tiny chairs would put us entirely too close together. If he even noticed, he didn't say anything about it and we continued to sit in silence waiting for Vero to surface again.

Finally I couldn't take the silence anymore and spoke up. "You guys played well the other night."

He looked up at me quickly startled that that I had even said anything. "Uh, did you watch? We lost that game." He sounded disappointed and I knew that most of that disappointment was with himself. Even if he had been ignoring me for all of these years, that didn't mean that I hadn't been paying attention to him. Sometimes I felt like I understood him better than myself.

"Sidney, you know that the losses aren't always your fault." I turned towards him and watched him stare back at me with his eyes looking more golden than ever.

"Are you saying that the losses are my fault occasionally?" he asked, a ghost of a smile appearing on his lips. My heart fluttered at the sight of his rare smile rare around me at least and I had to will it to calm down.

"Well you are the captain" I stated simply smiling back at him.

Vero ruined the moment by appearing again talking excitedly. "Okay guys, I set up appointments for the girls to come and try on the dresses. Are you both ready to go?"

I said goodbye to her in the parking lot and she thanked me again for being her dummy. Suddenly, I remembered that I still had Nathalie's soup container from when I was sick sitting in my car. I hadn't had time to go over there lately and drop it off.

"Oh Sidney, would you do me a favor? Can you give this back to Nathalie for me? It's been driving around with me all week."

"Why don't you give it to her yourself? She's making a big dinner tonight, you could just come over."

What? Was he seriously inviting me over to the Lemieuxs for dinner? This really wasn't a big deal considering I had been there a million times before for dinner but he had always sat as far away from me as possible and we hardly spoke. Mostly I just talked to the rest of the family while him and Mario talked strategy or something.

"I should probably call. I don't want to just drop in or anything."

He shrugged again and part of me hated for him for always looking so nonchalant and never showing what he was thinking. I could never do that because my emotions were always written right on my face. "It'll be fine, she never minds more mouths to feed."

"Um, okay then. I'll just follow you I guess." He nodded at me and walked over to his car waiting until I was in mine to follow him.

The whole way over, I kept waiting to wake up because surely I was dreaming. There's no way that in the real world, Sidney Crosby would actually invite me over to the Lemieuxs to have dinner with them.

Chapter 7

Hey guys! I wanted to update this story quick and it is quick. I also didn't proof-read it too much so sorry if there are weird typos or something.

Emma's POV:

"So I see that you and Marc figured things out" I commented holding Vero's left hand back up to the lights so that I could see her ring. It was gorgeous and totally Vero with the pretty princess cut diamond surround with smaller ones on the white gold band.

"Yeah, he reassured me that we were both ready to take the step. And after some convincing, I agreed" she said beaming and looking at the ring with me. I shuddered at the mental image of them "convincing" each other and kept my mouth shut. Sure we were friends, but it was gross in a cute-I don't want to hear about it- sort of way.

"I'm really happy for you V" I said smiling again and feeling the excitement of love and a wedding wash over me. I was hopeless like that and if I hadn't taken this job with the Pens, I imagine that I would have gone into wedding planning instead. Both jobs were similar in a way. You planned and executed a vision for the end result of making someone's day special and meaningful. There was magic in that and I knew that I would never be able to do something that didn't make other people happy.

"Did you work everything out with Sid?" she asked changing the subject. My eyes searched for his for the millionth time that night, spotting him on the other side of the VIP section.

"Yeah" I lied. We hadn't even gotten close to working anything out but I felt that we were both at least friendly with each other now. He didn't seem mad at me anymore which was definitely a plus. He claimed not to have a dark side but I could definitely see him having a nasty temper when he actually let it loose.

"Good," she smiled looking relieved. "Marc and I were worried that you two would end up fighting the whole way through planning our wedding."

"Vero, you know that I would never get in the way of your wedding."

"I know, I know. It's just that I'd like you to be my maid of honor since I don't have a sister or anything and I know Marc's asking Sidney to be his best man."

"Oh." I said feeling completely floored. "Vero, of course I'll be your maid of honor" I said hugging her tightly. I was still a little stunned that she had chosen me but we had become really, really close this year. "Wait, what about Eliza?" I asked not wanting her to be offended by the choice.

"Oh, I made sure it was okay with her. She said that she'd love to help out anyway so you both are maids of honor essentially. She's just trusting you to take the full load of the responsibility" she joked. "You are the one who basically plans events for a living."

"Vero, your wedding is not a charity case!" I laughed. The two were vastly different but no less problematic now that Sidney would be involved.

"This will be so great! You and Sid are good now so there won't be any problems when you help us plan stuff." She looked so elated that I didn't have the heart to tell her that things weren't quite that perfect yet.

"I'm excited too" I smiled faking my way through the whole time.

Sometimes I really hated my inability to tell the truth.

After another hour of hanging out with everyone, I was starting to get tired and my yawns were more frequent. Everyone was distracted with the news of Marc and Vero's engagement so I knew that I would be able to leave quietly.

"I'm gonna head out." I announced hugging both Max and Eliza and waving goodbye to the group.

"You can leave when I leave" Jordan joked throwing me an exaggerated wink. He had been drinking like everyone else so I let the comment go and shot him a "next time" and a smile instead. He really needed to find a different girl to flirt with and actually mean it for once.

"I'm going to leave too" Sidney announced startling me from where he was standing behind me. He's always creeping up on me.

Eliza gave me one of her looks and I did my best to ignore her. Sidney was still talking to a few of the guys while I searched for my coat and purse. With my coat on and my purse in hand, I thought that I was home-free and Sidney and I wouldn't even run into each other. Wrong.

"Where are you parked?" he asked joining me right outside the doors of the club.

"Um, I'm up the street a few blocks, this way" I gestured to the left wondering what he was up to. A few clubgoers were looking at us curiously obviously aware that he was Sidney Crosby but probably wondering what he was doing with me.

"Okay, I'll walk you" he said putting a hand on my elbow and leading me down the street.

"Wait, you don't have to. I mean, I'll be fine, I do know how to walk myself safely to my car at night" I protested. We hadn't finished our discussion from earlier and frankly, I was being a coward. I wanted to just forget about everything Sidney-related that had happened today.

"I'm sure you can" he laughed. "I just want to, okay? It's getting pretty rowdy down here."

I tried not to giggle at his choice of the word "rowdy" and the disapproving, old man face he was sporting. He was so cute when he acted like he was 65 years old. I was still feeling the affects of alcohol that brought out my stupid side. Normally I would still find things amusing about Sidney, that was part of the reason why I had harbored such a massive crush on him, but slightly drunk Emma laughs out loud at these cute traits and draws attention to her drunken self.

"What's so funny?" he asked leading me around a crowd of excited college students.

"Nothing" I said trying to stifle my laughter and look serious. It wouldn't help our relationship any if I kept laughing at him.

"So Marc and Vero huh? I can't believe that Flower's getting married" Sidney said after we had walked a little bit in silence. It occurred to me that this was a new first for me: Sidney actually trying to have a conversation with me.

"I know, I'm so excited though. I love weddings" I said sighing. Just thinking about it had my heart sighing dreamily.

"So you're one of those girls" he said looking slightly disgusted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked staring at him. How could anyone not love weddings? There was love, happiness, dancing and cake. I couldn't think of a better way to spend an evening.

"Well, they're kind of a waste of money" he stated simply. "And people get all worked up about them and spend months planning them and then it's all over in a couple of hours."

"Well if I'm one of those girls, then you're one of those guys." He looked at me questioningly and I felt proud of myself for catching him off guard. I kind of liked it. Actually, I really liked yelling at him too.

"You're one of those guys who get bitter about weddings and the whole process claiming that 'they're a waste of time and money' when years later, you end up going through with the whole process anyway just to make your bride happy."

He snorted and led me through another crowd of people trying to get into a popular bar, his hand resting briefly on the small of my back. I tried to ignore the little jolt I felt, even through my coat. "I don't think that marriage will be an option for me for a long time."

He looked so serious as he said this that it wasn't even amusing anymore. He almost looked sad and I didn't know what to say to that. I didn't know him well enough and I doubted that anything I could say would make him feel better about it. We walked the last few feet to my car in silence again with his hand still resting on my back.

"Thanks for walking with me" I said fumbling around for my keys. I felt like I was 16 years old and ending the night of my first date. "Do you want me to give you a ride back to your car? It's the least I can do so you can avoid the crowds." He agreed and got into the passenger side looking enormous in my small convertible. With the top up, it looked like he was ducking his head a bit just to fit in under the roof.

It was still bothering me about what he had said before. For the first time since I had known him, he had dropped his aloof facade with me and had let me in, even just a tiny bit.

"Hey Sid?" I said using his nickname as he got out of the car. "I really am sorry about what I said earlier. I didn't mean it and I'd like it if we could be friends."

"Don't worry about it" he said, his lips twitching as if he wanted to smile. "I'll see you around, okay?"

I nodded giving him one last smile as he shut the door and walked to his own car. As soon as he got out of the car, it occurred to me that he had never agreed to my offer of friendship.

Sid's POV:

That was definitely one of the strangest conversations that I had had in a long time. Especially with a woman. There hadn't exactly been a lot of time to have any conversations with women though lately. So what did I know?


Surprisingly though, that was the most open I had been with anyone in a long time and it was interesting considering who it was that I had been talking to. The girl who claims to hate me was the same girl I started to almost spill personal information to. It didn't make any sense but at least I now knew that we could start to get along. It would be pretty bad if I let things go back to the way that they used to be and I had the feeling that I would get my ass chewed out by more than a few people if I went back to ignoring her.

It had been pretty hard to miss how well she fit in and was liked by the team. Why hadn't I noticed how buddy-buddy she was with literally everyone, but me? She even knew the names of some of the player's kids. Why didn't I know some of this stuff?

There was still something about her that I was unsure of. I realized it as I got out of her car that night and she looked like she wanted to say something, but didn't. I felt like she knew something about me that I didn't and it kind of pissed me off. What did she think she knew? And why didn't she just say it? She always looked like she was on the verge of saying something to me, even when I was making her angry. So what was it?

I pushed it to the back of my mind and pushed the tape of the game from tonight into the DVD player.

I tried to ignore the fact that I could still see her eyes shining at me as I got out of her car. Fucking hell. What was it with this girl?

Chapter 6

Emma's POV:


"So let me get this straight, you told him, no yelled at him, that you 'don't like him'?" Vero asked trying to wrap her head around the idea. We were all dressed up and having drinks and I was explaining my shitty afternoon to them.

"Em, don't take this the wrong way but, don't you think you're both being just a little bit immature? Especially you?" Eliza asked looking at me skeptically.

"Well, yeah" I mean of course we were both acting ridiculously. But come on, he practically asked for it. "I can't help it, he brings out my temper."

"So then what happened?"

"Tanger walked in on us yelling and I just left." It had been embarrassing enough that someone caught us yelling like 5 year olds at each other.

"Oh my god" Vero said starting to laugh. "I think you two are my new favorite thing." My neck almost snapped by the force of quickly I turned to glare at her.

"So what are you going to do?" Eliza asked, always the level-headed one.

"Apologize I guess." I knew that I had to. We did have to work with one another throughout the year and it wasn't in me to purposefully be mean to someone. I had to apologize for being so rude and try to come to some sort of a truce with him.

"You know what? I think that this is good for him" Vero said suddenly sitting up straight on her barstool.

"What? Why do you say that?" Eliza said looking offended on behalf of Sid. Out of the three of us, she was a little bit closer to him as a friend. I obviously wasn't.

"Because, he's so used to everyone liking him and catering to him. Not that he demands it or anything, it's just happened since he's become the media's darling. Now, here is finally someone that doesn't take the crap he ocassionally disses out."

They both turned to me expectantly, waiting for some sort of reaction. Did I have one?

"It does make sense.." Eliza trailed off thoughtfully. "Max did mention that Sid's asked about you a lot lately."

"Okay ladies, stop. I know what you're getting at and it's not going to work. I'll find him next week and apologize to him. Maybe we can at least be friends out of all of this and no more" I emphasized.

Eliza gave me one of her cryptic "hmm's" while Vero sat and stared at me before changing the subject.

"So if we're gonna keep drinking, we need to eat, what do you say we go grab a table and continue the discussion there?"


After dinner, we left Houlihans and headed down to the South Side to finish watching the last half of the Pens game even though we had said it would be a hockey-free night.

Both Eliza and Vero looked at me every time Sidney missed an opportunity to shoot on goal. It was definitely not his game and I was starting to feel guilty after the 5th time he was checked into the boards by a Wild's player. They were one of the worst teams in the league and the Pens were losing miserably to them right now. Part of me felt guilty for maybe playing a small role in screwing with his game.

"I'm texting Marc" Vero announced once the post-game coverage began.

"They will definitely need to go out after that game" Eliza announced shaking her head.

"Are you sure?" I questioned. They had lost 5-2 and I highly doubted they would want to go out after that.

"Oh believe me, Max of all people will insist that they do. Besides, it was just one game."

Just one game! Obviously Eliza took this a little less seriously than most hockey fans did. It was the Wild that they lost to. The Wild. Practically a joke compared to how the Pens normally played.

"Max said they'll meet us in an hour" Eliza said getting off the phone. Vero was still chatting away in french to Marc, probably trying to calm him down. He got a little frantic after losses.

"You will apologize, right?" She looked very much the angry school teacher and believe me, I did feel the shame.

"Yes, okay? I do feel bad you know. And I don't actually hate him."

"Okay, just make sure that you do" she said leaving it at that. With that said, we paid our tab and headed out to Diesel.

They weren't going to blame me the entire night, right?

Well, apparently they were.

Kris greeted me by asking, "What did you do to our Captain?" while I hung out by the bar waiting to get my drink. He was the fifth guy to come up and ask me that. For now, I was content to hang out by the bar and avoid everyone for a little bit. I hadn't expected to even see Sidney until next week but he had come along with the guys, despite the loss that no one was letting me forget. Sure, I was wearing my new shoes, but I definitely wasn't feeling confident when I looked into his face and saw his facial expression. He was positively glowering at me. Not good.

"Hey" the bartender smiled finally noticing me at the bar. I tore my face away from Sidney's in the VIP lounge where he was still looking a little bit scary. "What can I get for you gorgeous?" Even though his delivery was a little cheesy, he was pretty cute and it was a Friday night, what was wrong with a little flirting? Besides, I had tried really hard that night to look good. I was wearing one of my only pairs of tight jeans that normally stayed at the back of my closet and a white silk blouse that Eliza had insisted that I wear the day before. My red hair had even been tamed into soft curls that hadn't wilted yet as they hung around my shoulders.

"I'll have a mojito, please" I ordered as he gave me his most charming smile.

"I need your name first" he said leaning on the bar. Okay, he was definitely charming, and he knew it.

"It's Emma" I said smiling enjoying the dimples on his cheeks when he grinned.

"Well nice to meet you Emma, I'm Derek" he said leaning against the bar now. He continued to chat me up while he mixed my drink and I noticed that he took his time even though the bar was packed with people all trying to get something.

He was definitely cute but probably not my type. Besides, I had to go back and face everyone and Sidney eventually.

The hole burning in the back of my head from his glare was ruining my good time anyway.

"Will you please go talk to him? He's been a total moody mess since he got here" Vero said coming up to me immediately once I was upstairs in the VIP lounge. He was sitting in the corner talking to Marc and I nodded knowing that I had to do it sooner or later. Might as well apologize now.

"Marc? Do you mind if I talk to Sidney for a second?" I interrupted them suddenly feeling even less confident than I had before.

"Sure" he said getting up and leaving us alone within seconds. Sidney was looking down at his hands decidedly not meeting my gaze and leaving the decision of whether to sit or not up to me.

"So, um, hi" I started off brilliantly with a display of eloquence. His eyes darted up to mine where I was still standing awkwardly in front of him.

"Emma, what did you come over here to say? If you don't have anything to say, then I'll spare you my presence since you don't like me."

Ouch. Guess he really wasn't taking what I said well. I honestly didn't know that he would care that much. It wasn't like he noticed me before.

"Sidney" I sighed taking the available seat next to him. "I'm really sorry about what I said earlier." If we had been better friends, this would have been a moment when I gave his hand a squeeze or grabbed it simply to hold. Instead I tried my best not to look away from his intense gaze now focused on me.

"I know that we don't really know each other that well but I do know that I don't hate you." I didn't think that I could ever really and truly hate him. Deep down I knew he was a good guy, I was just letting my own conflicting emotions get in the way. "I am friends with a lot of guys on the team though and I work with you, I'd really like it if we could call a truce or something."

He was now staring down at the drink in his hand not saying anything. I really hoped that he would accept my apology so we could go back to normal.

"Why aren't we friends?" he asked suddenly. Huh?

"What do you mean?" He wasn't serious was he? It was almost amusing, his sudden interest in our non-existent friendship.

"Well you're friends with everyone else on the team, so why aren't we friends too?" Next to Eliza, he was the most logical person that I knew. So of course he would see this as a black and white sort of thing.

"Sidney, you've never wanted to be friends with me!" I had to laugh now. "Believe me, I've tried. You've just always been so.." I paused trying to think of the right word to describe his past ignorance of me. "Distant. You've always been distant." He wasn't so distant now as I realized we were sitting very close. So close that I could almost see all of the gold amongst the brown in his eyes.

"Emma, I haven't meant to be so-"

"Why are both of you so serious over here? Come over and toast with us! Marc and Vero just announced that they're getting married!" Jordan interrupted both of us and secretly I was happy for the chance to escape. Sidney's eyes were still on mine as if to say 'we still have to talk about this.'

"Did I interrupt something?" Jordan asked looking between us.

"Emma! Sidney come here!" Vero yelled holding up a shot glass in celebration. I caught the twinkle of a ring on her left finger and wondered why Vero hadn't mentioned it earlier.

"We decided to announce it now and surprise everyone" Vero said giving me a tight hug and putting a small glass in my hand, identical to the ones everyone else was now holding.

It was hard for me to concentrate during the toast with Sidney's gaze on mine. I didn't know what he was thinking but I felt like something important had happened that night- something I couldn't put my finger on yet.

Chapter 5

Emma's POV:

Following a week of still feeling groggy and sick, I was finally feeling good not only physically, but also about the Children's Partnership Project. All of the players had committed legally by contract thank you, Eliza! and I was even in the talks for promotional and financial support with some companies willing to sponsor in part with the Penguins. Everything was miraculously falling in place and I was so happy, I almost didn't know what to do with myself. Almost.

"Do you like these shoes?" I asked holding out a pair of leopard pumps for Eliza to see. It had become our custom to lunch but actually go shoe shopping during our lunch breaks. It happened at least once a week now and even though our credit cards cringed with every swipe, it was practically a tradition now.

"Cute!" she chirped holding up a strappy pair of red heels for me to see. "Those are sex shoes" she joked pointing at the leopard ones I was convinced I had to have.

"God, why did you have to say that?" I said putting the shoes down. Embarrassing much?

"Because it's true! They're an animal print and they look hot on you with your red hair. Face it, they're come hither, sex shoes." I looked down at them thinking about what she said. Maybe I could still get them and think of them as my new 'confidence' shoes instead.

"Well whatever. I'm buying them" I announced marching over to the cash register. Eliza joined me shortly to bring over the red shoes to be boxed up again. "Are we still on for Friday?" I asked referring to the girl's night out we had planned for this week.

"Yeah, the guys have a game so I figured that we could go out and maybe meet up with them at Diesel afterwards. We'll have designated drivers." she winked sarcastically. If the Pens won that night, we would be the designated drivers- it happened all of the time when they were celebrating. As I became closer with the team, I found myself not minding that much simply because the boys were hilarious when under the influence. Ironically enough, Sidney was always a designated driver too even though he was certainly old enough to drink.

I had to stop myself from thinking about him again like I had been for the past week. He had this way of sneaking up on me when I least expected him and invading my thoughts which was becoming increasingly annoying. My avoidance plan was not going well either because he was utterly insistent about catching me while we were both at the Mellon and checking in on the Children's Partnership Program. I had seen him three times since he brought me soup last week and thankfully, the rest of the time he was away playing hockey. I couldn't handle much more of his sneaking up on me and our awkward, strained conversations.


"So how's the program planning going so far?" Eliza asked pulling me into J.Crew.

"Good, I'm pretty sure that I'll be able to set up some sort of charity event by the end of the season at least to raise some money for the program. I'm thinking that we'll be able to have official events by the start of next season" I said excitedly.

"Is Sid still stalking you?" This was her new favorite subject and she and Vero found it hilarious the amount of attention he had been paying me lately.

"He's not stalking me" I said rolling my eyes. Her grin widened and I wondered how bad of an influence Max was on her. She used to be so sweet.

"He's simply taken an annoying interest in the program even though I've made it very clear that I don't need him or want him involved." That part was true, no matter how cold or indifferent I was to that boy, he kept coming back to me with ideas or offers to help.

She made a "hmm" noise and kept her mouth shut. Last time she had tried to give me her opinion about this earlier in the week, I had taken her blackberry hostage and now she was a little bit more careful about what she said.

"Don't give me that, okay? I know you think something's happening there but I know Sidney. He's only doing this because he has a conscience and doesn't like anyone to be angry at him. I yelled at him and now he thinks he has to make it up to me. In time he'll understand that he doesn't and he'll continue to ignore me like he always did." I tried not to sound sad but I almost couldn't help it. I didn't want Eliza to feel bad for me when there was no reason to. Out of this whole experience I had at least gained some sense and knew better than to continue waiting for Sidney to come around. He wasn't going to and maybe eventually we would be friends, but until then, I had to get over him.

The most important part was that I wasn't giving up on myself. I had seen all sorts of ridiculous couples in my lifetime and was a firm believer that there is someone out there for everyone. I just have to believe that I will find that person eventually.

"You look serious all of the sudden" Eliza commented examining a cashmir sweater.

"Oh? I'm fine" I said smiling and actually believing it for once. "I just think maybe I should get back, I need to chase down some more people before the day is over for the kid's hockey camp coming up." Unfortunately that did mean finding Sidney and giving him the dates and times for the camp that he always helped out at. Luckily I had to find other players too and talking to them would make the experience more fun.


It was always easier to do this in person and I called Jordan ahead of time to see where he and the guys were. I preferred to talk to the players themselves instead of going through agents and assistants- all of them were pretty bitchy to the peon workers like myself.


"Oh, you won't find them today. Remember they have a two game roadtrip before the home game this Friday. You're better off catching them all on Friday afternoon when they'll all be in one place" Eliza commented before we parted ways. Well that's one less thing to do today. I decided to head back to the office and work on budgeting plans that I had to finalize for different community projects I was working on with other directors.


For the next two days, I worked my ass off to ensure that I was up to speed on events planning for the summer and upcoming season. The boys were going to be in the playoffs this year so most charitable events had ended already due to the busy playing schedule. Usually this meant a lot of down time and planning for the next season but on top of all of this, I was starting up my Children's program or CPP as I was now calling it. I liked being busy though and almost forgot that it was Friday until Vero reminded me with a text that we were going out that night and gave me the designated meeting spot.

Houlihans 7pm. Don't be late!


I'll be there. I shot her a quick text back smiling when I remembered that I had new shoes to wear.

"What are you smiling about?" Nathalie startled me stepping into my office. I held a hand over my rapidly beating heart and took a deep breath. I hated being snuck up on and startled easily.

"Sorry I scared you hun" she said laughing and shutting the door behind her. "It was open so I just assumed I could step in."

"No, no, it's okay" I said smiling. "What are you doing here this early? The game isn't for another couple of hours."

"Oh well I came in to drop off stuff Mario left at home about his golf tournament. The kids are coming to the game tonight so I was wondering if you and the girls would be sitting with us?"

It still made my heart swell everytime they included me in their family functions. They really were the most generous people that I knew however private they tried to be.

"Actually, we're not coming to the game tonight. We decided to go out instead but thanks for the invite. I haven't seen the kids in awhile so tell them that I said hi." I adored the Lemieux children and it was almost as if I was related to them. I had even changed some of their diapers back when I would babysit for them in high school and in college.

"Oooh. Girls night out, huh?" She said grinning at me. "Well, we'll miss you girls in the box tonight. Did you eat all of the soup I sent over for you?" She had a twinkle in her eye that was hard to miss and I knew that it wasn't entirely for convenience sake that she sent Sidney over with soup to me. I wasn't going to oblige her by mentioning the bearer of the soup.

"Yes, and it was delicious, thanks."

"So it was just the soup that was good?" That smug look on her face was still going strong.

"Aunt Nat, wipe that look off of your face. Only the soup warmed my soul that day. Nothing and
no one else." It was obvious and embarrassing what she was implying and I hated that my crush on him had been pretty obvious before. Well no more.

"Well he's fast on the ice and pretty slow when it comes to everything else." Even though there were a hundred nasty things I could follow that statement with, I chose to be diplomatic and keep my mouth shut. I loved Nathalie probably more than my own mother but I really didn't want anyone interfering in my non-existent relationship with him. Plus, it just proved even more that he only brought the soup over because he was asked. And Sidney Crosby always did the nice, right thing.

Since it was already 5pm, I decided to head down and talk to the players like I had planned earlier.

"You can join me if you want to. Hassle the guys a bit if you feel like it" I invited Aunt Nat along but she declined saying that she was going to go home and get the kids together before driving back over here for the game.

"Make sure you come over to dinner soon" she said giving me a kiss on the cheek goodbye. Seriously, why can't I just be their daughter?

I watched her go and gathered up all of the papers I needed to hand out to the boys. I wished all of them had fax machines or something just so I could send them the information instead of lugging it around to them all of the time. Surprisingly the training room was pretty empty when I popped my head in to see if the usual crowd would be there getting wrapped up or stretched. Unsurprisingly, Sidney was there stretching in spandex along with Hal Gill and Sergei Gonchar. I said a general hello to them and escaped not wanting to be anywhere near Sidney unless he was dressed. Seeing his butt stretch every which way like that was not good for my new mental state.

One of the trainers recognized me and sent me out to the ice where most of the guys were messing around before they actually had to get ready.
"Em!" Max was the first to spot me out of the crowd. "What brings you here pretty lady?" Oh Max, ever the flirt.
"Actually, I'm here just to drop off information for you guys about hockey camps for kids in the summer" I said holding up the paperwork in my arms.
"Emma! Come out on the ice with us!" Jordan called over from where he was shooting on the empty net.
"Hah, yeah right. Nice try though!" I called back. It was well-known that I couldn't skate well and I had turned down countless offers of skating in the past. I highly suspected that I would spend most of my time on my butt while they skated circles around me teasingly.
"How about I leave the info at your stalls?" I was entertained by their on-ice antics for another minute before turning to head back into the locker room. I waved goodbye to them again before turning and colliding headlong into something hard.

"Ow" I held my now pulsing head and blinked up into Sidney's face who was similarly holding his chin in pain.
"Sorry, you turned so fast I didn't have a chance to let you know I was behind you." He said dropping his hand from his chin.
"God, did you have to stand right there?" I snapped unable to check myself. My forehead hit his brick of a chin and it hurt.
"I said that I was sorry." His tone had a little bit of a bite in it and he didn't look apologetic anymore.
"Fine" I said stepping around him and continuing into the locker room to pass out packets at each stall. Somehow I wasn't surprised when he followed me. This motivated me to speed up just so I could get out of there.

"You know, I never knew that you were this rude of a person" he commented sitting down at his stall and fidgeting with his stick. That got my attention.

"I'm rude?" I said turning to face him. Okay, so maybe I had been pretty mean with him lately, but seriously, why didn't he just take the hint and avoid me at all costs too?
"Yeah, every time I try to be nice to you, you practically run away from me." His face was devoid of emotion as he said this making it hard for me to read him. This was actually the expression I was used to receiving from him but it still frustrated me.

I decided to play dumb instead. "Sidney, that's ridiculous. I think you're thinking about this a little too much."

"Don't play dumb with me.You freak out every time I even approach you." He was standing now and trying to intimidate me with his height advantage over me. Asshole.

"That's ridiculous" I said stepping around him and placing his packet on a shelf in his stall.

"You're doing it now!" he pointed out gesturing to the space I had now put between us. He stepped closer again and I resisted the urge to hit him while I stood my ground.

"I've apologized over and over again for being a jerk about your program thing-"

"It is not a thing!" I interrupted annoyed by his choice of words.

"And you still won't forgive me or let me help out. So seriously, what's the deal? Would you stop moving everywhere?" He snapped reaching out and holding me in place by the arms. While his hold was light, him grabbing me was the final straw. He kept pushing and pushing me and my temper got the best of me.

"Because damn it, I don't like you!" I yelled watching his face darken. "Are you happy that I said it now?" I felt like a jerk but he could make me so angry.

"Uh, guys? What's going on?" Over Sidney's shoulder I saw Kris standing awkwardly in the doorway watching us both glare at each other. Sidney let go of me and stepped back putting some breathing room between us and I shuffled past him.

"Everything's fine. I left information for you at your stall Kris. Good luck tonight." After that I walked out not even looking back at Sidney. He could go straight to hell as far as I was concerned.

Sid's POV:

I watched her walk away for the umpteenth time that week and felt like I wanted, no needed, to punch something.

"How'd you piss her off?" Kris commented. "I've never seen her look so angry before."

"Yeah, well I don't know." I didn't feel like talking to anyone, especially since we had a game tonight. It didn't help that my stall still smelled like her perfume either.

"She's a cool girl, you should be nicer to her" Kris said shrugging and leaving me alone in the locker room. How was any of this my fault? She was the one with a stick up her ass about something even though I had apologized and tried to be nice to her. Despite me obviously being nice to her, everyone around me still felt the need to remind me of how cool of a person she was and how I should be nicer to her. I was nice! She was the one who could no longer even bear to be around me.

This was why I didn't have girlfriends. Women could make you feel guilty, bite your head off and then mess with your game. I always messed things up anyway so it was best not to even get involved until later on when I had more time. It kept annoying me though that she thought of me as scum. I didn't understand it and thought that maybe persistence, like in hockey, would pay off. Instead I got verbally attacked by her.

I tried to put it out of my mind but somehow she kept popping back up. I couldn't shake the image of her glaring at me out of my head, even throughout warm-ups before the game.

Well, I got it now. I wasn't going to try to help her out or be nice anymore. If she disliked me so much, I would take the hint and stay away from her. At least then my chin wouldn't hurt from her damned hard head and I could get my concentration back.

Chapter 4

Thank goodness for rainy days at home. Also, thanks Jay for the chicken noodle soup idea ;D and thanks to everyone who reviews this story! It really does help me write.


Emma's POV:

I woke up the next morning to the sound of my alarm going off like it always did at 6 am on weekday mornings. I did feel considerably better compared to the day before but not well enough to go back to work.

Okay so maybe I just wanted a day off in the middle of the work week but under the premise of being sick, I didn't see what was wrong with that. After making the necessary calls to the voicemail of my boss and Florence to hold all calls during the day, I rolled back over and pulled the covers back over my head.

The next time I woke up, it was to the sound of my doorbell ringing. I groaned looking at the clock that now read 11:30 wondering who the hell could be bothering me right now. My parents were on vacation in Costa Rica and they always called before stopping over so it couldn't be them. Everyone else I knew was working anyway, so who was it?

The doorbell rang again and I threw on a robe without glancing in the mirror and bundled it up tightly. It's probably the damn UPS man or something. Through the shaded glass around the front door, I could see someone standing there shifting back and forth slightly and about to reach for the doorbell again. My throbbing head protested the possibility of a loud noise and I quickly opened the door before the mystery person could ring the doorbell again.

Needless to say, I was shocked when I saw that it was Sidney Crosby standing on the other side of my door holding daisies and a big tupperware container (Note: Bet you didn't think that I would have him bring her soup, huh?)

"Hi" he said smiling and taking in my haphazard appearance. Okay so I was wearing blue pajamas with sheep on them and a pink robe- that didn't mean that he had to look amused.

"What are you doing here?" Again I wanted to add but I kept quiet. This was the second time he had come over uninvited and I didn't get it.

"Nathalie sent me over with soup. I brought the flowers" he said holding them up again. "Uh, can I come in?" he asked looking beyond me into the house. I wanted to say no but he took my silence as a yes and gently nudged his way in past me.

As I watched him walk past me into the kitchen, I hoped that he got sick as an end result of all of this. That would at least prove that there was some justice in the world.

"Sidney you can just leave it on the table there" I pointed to the kitchen table and hoped that he would leave it there, give me the stupid flowers and leave. As if it wasn't painful enough that he seemed to be everywhere at once nowadays, he also had to see me in my most unattractive states.

"Uh, do you have a pot or something?" He said looking around my kitchen. "I think that's what Nathalie told me to do with this." He was scratching the back of his neck again and I tried to ignore the fact that it was kind of cute. He was wearing his workout clothes with his curly hair bundled into a Pens cap and I realized he must have come from their morning skate.

"Look I'm really not feeling up to soup" Or your company. "Could you just leave it, please?"

"Sure" he said looking considerably less chipper all of the sudden.

"So what's the real reason you're over here?" I said cutting to the chase. Sidney Crosby didn't just take soup over to poor girls in need. There had to be a reason why he was here buttering me up with soup and daisies.

"Nathalie made you soup and asked me to drop it off. We didn't get to talk yesterday after the game either, so here I am." His explanation seemed reasonable enough but I still didn't understand why he wouldn't give up on the Children's Partnership Program when he was too busy to do it anyway. He was exhausting me and that alone was making me hungry for the first time in 24 hours.

"Well what is there to talk about?" I said digging out a pot for the soup. "I already accepted your apology for backing out and like I said, it's totally fine." I really was trying to be nice. I was not a mean or vindictive person by nature and I didn't want to start being that way to him either.

"I know you did. I just feel like I can do more. I don't want to start becoming that guy who is too busy to do things that are important- like this program is."

Hold up, did Sidney Crosby just call my baby important? While the former me would have probably melted into a puddle at his feet, I held back another sneeze and stayed strong and relatively clear-headed.

I nodded still feeling a little apprehensive about his change of attitude towards me.

"Okay, so are you going to teach me how to heat up this soup for you or what?" he grinned giving me the impish one all of those fan girls always blogged about. It was enough to almost make my poor immune system feel better. Almost.

"You don't know how to cook? I thought that the kid wonder could do everything" I partly joked. He seriously doesn't know how to reheat things?

"Yeah" he laughed "Well, not everything" he trailed off making me wonder if there was more to that statement than he would let on.

The heavy burdened look that he tried to disguise most of the time had returned to his face making him appear older than his 22 years. He was only about a month older than me but at times like this, I felt like he was years ahead of everyone around us.

"What kind of soup is it?" I asked peering into the big tupperware container. "Chicken noodle?" Nathalie Lemieux literally made the best chicken noodle soup on the face of the earth.

"Uh, I think so" he said coming closer to look down into the container with me. I wasn't used to being close to him physically or mentally and I instinctively backed off moving away to begin heating up the soup. Weird.

"Are you, uh, feeling better?" he asked still trying to make conversation with me. Why is he still standing so close. Better yet, why is he still here?

"Definitely feeling less like roadkill today" I said laughing slightly. "Mostly, I just wanted the excuse to stay home in my PJ's all day" I gestured to my ridiculous outfit hoping that a laugh at my expense would loosen us both up a bit. And maybe shoo him along. I was seriously confused why Sidney Crosby was hanging out in my kitchen with me right now.

He did laugh, surprising me even more. It was one of those goofy, full-blown laughs that I had heard myths about but didn't quite know what to do now that I had witnessed it. "Everyone needs a day like that" he said still smiling at me. Huh? I almost pinched myself for the simple fact that I had made him laugh.

In my sick state, was I now resorting to hallucinations? "I think I need to sit down" I said reaching for the nearest kitchen stool.

"What's wrong, are you okay?" he was back into serious Sidney mode bending down in front of me to make sure that I was okay.

"I think I'm hallucinating" I mumbled suddenly needing water. Water would clear my head, right?

"Here, let me get you something cold to drink" He rooted around in my cabinets until he found the glasses and filled it up with cold water before passing it back to me. I drank it gratefully almost disappointed when Sidney didn't disappear from my kitchen in his cute athletic wear. Damn it.

"You're still here." Oh how I wish I could take that back. I cringed when I saw his eyebrows furrow in confusion at my babbling.

"Uh yeah. Listen, maybe you need to go lie down again. I think you're getting worse." He started to gently lead me away from the kitchen and towards the direction of the stairs.

"Yeah I think you're right." I stopped us at the stairs knowing that he would follow me into my bedroom if I didn't get my head together quickly. "Thanks for bringing the soup by and the flowers. That was really considerate of you."

"You're welcome" he said giving me smile. Thankfully he was taking the hint and leaving before I started to act stupidly again.

"Feel better Emma" he said holding the door open another second before turning and walking down the path to his car.

I made sure that all of the doors were locked and the kitchen cleaned up before I headed upstairs to my bed again. I fell asleep wishing that it all had been a dream. That at least would make sense.

"Wakey, wakey!!" The next thing I knew, I was being pushed at and spoken to in a heavily accented voice. Vero.

"Come on Em. We're going out to dinner and drinks" she said bouncing up onto the bed with me. I had this thing about beds where ever since I was a little girl, I had only wanted the biggest and fluffiest princess beds. Sadly that had carried into adulthood but it was amusing to see short little Vero climb onto the bed with me.

"Seriously, I know you're awake and your color's back. Now put on some clothes and let's go!"

"Vero, no." I whined trying to pull the covers back over my head. I hadn't forgotten about earlier and getting out of my bed would almost make it real. I was such a pussy.

"Hey, why don't you have wine?" Eliza said popping her head into the door. "Jeez, you need to shower" she said taking in my attire.

"God, Max isn't here with you is he?" I half expected him to pop his head in to see what was going on. It was like he couldn't do anything without her anymore. Annoying but cute.

"No, he's out with the boys tonight. I think they're heading over to Diesel which is exactly why we need to go out also and have a good time" Vero said bouncing up and down again.

"Oh" I said feeling like I didn't have a choice. I didn't feel sick anymore after sleeping most of the day away. But wasn't it better just to play it safe?

"Are you sure we can't just stay in? Order takeout maybe?" I asked not entirely willing to go out and be with crowds of people tonight. Besides, it was a weeknight. It was more responsible all around if we stayed in.

"Oh, chinese food?" Eliza said popping her head back into the doorway.

"If you promise to at least shower and put on cuter pajamas, then we'll stay in" Vero said still eyeing me and my unshowered state.

I nodded and pushed my way out from under the covers to head into the bathroom and shower. When I emerged 10 minutes later clean and skin still pink from scrubbing at my skin, I found that Vero had made my bed and straightened up my room for me. I got dressed into clean clothes this time following the noise of the girls giggling downstairs. For as obtrusive as they could be sometimes, they were also my best friends and I knew they meant well.

"Mr. Wok delivers out here!" Eliza said excitedly. Before Max, Mr. Wok was her number one man and she hated the fact that they didn't deliver to her and Max's house in Fox Chapel. My little house was luckily within city limits though and they still delivered out here even though I was technically in the suburbs. It had been my maternal grandparents house and I had spent most of my summer refurnishing it after graduation when they left it to me and moved down to Florida. At least it's mine and I don't have to live with my parents.

"Did you make soup today?" Vero asked gesturing to the big container sitting in the middle of my fridge.

"Uh no, Sidney brought it over" I winced at the expressions on both of their faces when I turned around.

"Oh no" Eliza said suddenly looking horrified. Vero was wearing a similar expression, making me feel like something was really wrong.

"We should have known this would happen" Vero shook her head while Eliza nodded.

"What!?" I was getting frustrated because they were leaving me out of the loop.

"You don't see it?" Eliza asked staring at me. Was this another side effect of being sick? Utter confusion?

"Em, he's intrigued by you now because you've made it clear that you don't like him anymore."

"Guys always want what they can't have. Even the infallible Sidney Crosby isn't immune to this age-old phenomenon." Vero added both of them still nodding like bobble-heads.

"What? You've got to be joking. Nathalie made me soup, he brought it over." That was it. He was going to leave me alone after all of this. He was just being nice.

"And so who are the daisies from?" Vero said eyeing the arrangment I had set in a vase on the kitchen counter.

"Those are mine" I said not wanting to admit that he had brought them over. So I was lying, what was a little harmless lie here and there in life?

"Really?" Eliza said eyeing me like she didn't believe me. She was dating Max and was a lawyer. She was damn good at sniffing out lies and I tried to be as cool and collected as possible.

"Yes" I reiterated starting to get just a little bit irritated. Sidney Crosby was not interested in me now that I wanted nothing to do with him. That was like one of those bad romance novels I spent my time reading in high school.

The doorbell rang saving me and I ran to grab my wallet and cover the bill before either of them could protest. The my house, my credit card rule applied here, especially when it came to food.

"So now that we're done talking about Em's denial, I need to talk to someone before I burst" Vero said picking at her soy noodles. What she said next, I was not expecting.

"Marc wants to get married" she waiting to guage our reactions.

"What? That's wonderful!" My heart instantly fluttered at the romantic possibility of a wedding. I loved weddings and watching people on their happy day.

"Aren't you excited?" Eliza said watching Vero. Suddenly I noticed that she didn't look that excited.

"I don't know. I'm not sure if we're ready" she said scooping more noodles into her mouth. "I mean, we've been dating for like 3 years, so why does he want to get married all of the sudden? We're still young!" she said gesturing wildly. She tended to get a little theatrical when she was worried about something.

"Wait a minute. You guys love each other, so maybe he just feels like this is the right time. I mean, he's more settled because they won the cup last year and he has a great contract with the Pens. This is just him taking the next logical step in your relationship." I was one of those hopeless romantics that believed in long-lasting love. If you loved someone enough, everything would work out. Even if I had never had the chance to apply this theory in my life yet, I still believed in it.

"Yeah, I guess I should just talk to him about it. I kind of left him hanging because he was going out and I was coming over here to meet up with you guys." She obviously felt bad but I felt worse for Marc. Poor Flower, probably trying to drown his sorrows right now at the bar.

We finished our dinners and started to watch an old movie on TV but it was obvious that Vero was distracted. "V, why don't you just go home. I can tell that you want to talk to him."

"Thanks," she said smiling. "I didn't want to be rude and leave you guys." She was already up and grabbing her coat throwing out empty takeout boxes along the way.
"I'm going to get going too. Wanna lunch tomorrow?" Eliza asked wrapping her scarf around her neck.

"Sure" I said not completely wanting everyone to leave. Most of the time, I was happy to be alone considering it had been just me most of my life anyway but on nights like this, it was a little sad to have my friends leaving me to go home to their boyfriends. I don't even have a cat.

After watching them both drive away and locking my house up for the second time that day, I let myself wonder what it would be like to have someone to go home to or cook for like these girls did. Not that I had time for that sort of thing but once in awhile, it would be nice to have a guy around.

Maybe I should take Vero's advice and date more. Maybe that could be a part of my new life theory where I grabbed life with both hands and told it who was boss. Maybe.

Chapter 3

Emma's POV:

I woke the next morning feeling like I had been hit by a freight train. To put it delicately. I was a snotty, congested mess and I was afraid to even look in the mirror for fear of putting myself in a worse mood.

Pulling the thermometer out of my mouth, I read the temperature of 101.2 degrees fahrenheit. Great. Squaring my shoulders, I walked back into the bathroom determined to go into work anyway. After my disasterous day and evening yesterday, I had to go in and make this program the best charity program the Pens had ever seen.

An hour later I had pulled myself together and was even wearing a fancy black dress and sweater that I knew would give me an extra boost of confidence when I met with my bosses this afternoon to go over progress so far on this project and a few other groups I was working with. The Pens would be hosting their hockey camps for kids in a few months towards the end of summer and arrangements still needed to be made to get those together.

I was just walking into Mellon arena when my phone rang in my purse. "Hi Vero" I said answering and covering up a sneeze.

"Jeez. You sound terrible Em! Are you okay?" Gee, thanks Vero.

"I'm fine. I just have a cold or something." I really wanted to know why she was calling, not be told how terrible I sounded.

"Okay well, I was just calling to warn you ahead of time. On our way home last night, Sidney kept asking us questions about why you were so angry and more questions about the program itself and I think he's going to do it now." She sounded wary of my reaction considering how I had blown up twice yesterday over all of this.

"What?" I screeched startling the guard who opened the door for me. "Why? Tell him that he's not allowed!" I realized that I was now being extremely childish. Note: extremely childish. But he brought out this reaction in me considering I didn't understand him or his flip-flopping emotions at all.

"Em I can't! The guys are already at morning skate before the game tonight and if I know Sid, he'll come and find you himself."

She let me rant some more until I finally got off the line after promising to stay calm and sit with her at the game tonight. I always went to home games and usually sat with the Lemieuxs because they knew how much I loved hockey. Now it had become my custom to also hang out with Vero and Eliza on game nights which also made it a girl's night out of sorts.

I shut my phone and marched past everyone in the office until I could shut myself away and get to work. I had too much to do today to be bothered with comments about how horrible I knew I looked. Now it seemed I was going to have to avoid Sidney also.

By 2pm I had already sat through a meeting, a business lunch and a tearful consolation of a coworker in the ladies' room over an anniversary gift from her husband gone bad. I didn't want to mention that I was possibly the worst person to talk to about relationships and instead let her cry on my shoulder, careful not to sneeze on her or anything.

I was busy gathering up the phone numbers and contacts I needed to get the summer hockey camps in order when my phone rang. "Hello?"

"Emma, Sidney Crosby is here to see you." Florence, the middle-aged receptionist for our office said in her monotone voice. Mary the receptionist in the legal department was so much better. She at least has a personality.

"No!" I said speaking without thinking. "I mean, he can't. I'm on my way out to a meeting" I said trying to cover up my outburst. I heard her saying something away from the phone and what sounded like a male's voice responding.

"Do you know when you'll be back?" Florence asked. Damn it, I hated lying. "No, sorry I don't. Listen, I'm sorry but I really do have to get going." I didn't sound very convincing but then again, I was going to have to leave the office just to keep the story straight and that would definitely cut important time out of my work day. I hung up the phone feeling more sick than I had this morning and now I was going to be forced to run out and leave the office for awhile for my 'meeting.' Luckily I did have to run and meet with a few of the local YMCA directors to let them know that the Children's Partnership Program was indeed approved and running and to see if they knew of any other activity groups for kids that would be interested in the program. Normally this was something that I would reserve for my weekends but right now I was stuck and needed something to do away from the office. Thanks again, Crosby.

To top it off, my nose was running more than ever and I definitely looked like a crack addict with all of the nose-spray I had been using during the day. That'll really convince adults that I am responsible with children.

I wrapped my scarf securely around my neck, piling the rest of my layers on in an attempt to stay warm. Yes, it was almost the end of March but my screwy immune system had decimated my body temperatures. I'm sure that I vaguely looked like a colorful version of the Michelin man as I crept out of of the office praying to god that I didn't run into Sidney. With his mood swings from the past few days and my horrible luck, I wouldn't put it past him to wait for me and ambush me. Strike that, he has more important things to do.

"Emma" I froze hearing my name being called by the voice I once fantasized about. Now I was quickening my pace and pathetically running away. His stride was longer than mine and he quickly caught up to me.
"Oh, hi Sidney" I said pretending not to have heard him earlier. "Did you need something?"


"Whoa, are you okay? You look terrible" he said looking at me. Was that concern I saw? He covered it up when he noticed that I was glaring at him again and I ground out another "Do you need something?" He hasn't commented on anything relating to me for years and now all of the sudden he has the balls to tell me I look terrible on a day when I'm sick?

He looked at me skeptically like he didn't buy my whole casual act. "Uh yeah. Do you have a minute to talk about the program thing? You know the one from yesterday?" He was rubbing the back of his neck again and that at least made me feel slightly better. I wanted him to feel nervous talking to me. Anything was better than the way he usually swatted me off like I was an annoyance or something.

"Actually, I'm on my way out. So can it wait? You don't have to apologize again Sidney- I have more than enough people willing to support the program and I understand how busy you are." That part at least was true. I more than a lot of people did understand just how busy and crazy his life was. I just couldn't bring myself to forgive him for saying yes and then backing out. If he had said no in the first place, then I would have gotten over the disappointment in time. But the fact that he said yes and then brushed me off really got to me. I did not forgive people who went back on their commitments.

I was entirely too used to people doing that in my life and when it came to Sidney, I wasn't willing to deal with it. It just hurt too much.

He sighed and I wished that he would just let it go because we were both obviously uncomfortable in each other's presence. "Are you coming to the game tonight?" he asked. His brown eyes were boring into mine and I suddenly felt a lot warmer. I settled for nodding instead of saying anything else. "Okay, well, can you try to wait around so I can find you? I really need to talk to you about this."

"I don't know. I don't really feel good Sidney. Can we please just let this go?"

"Just wait, please" he said clearly ignoring the fact that I didn't want to talk to him. Maybe it was a good thing I couldn't stand him anymore considering everything that he said and did now had the capacity to infuriate me. Why wasn't he picking up on my verbal and physical cues that I was unwilling to speak to him? Clenched fists, glares and the word "no" generally signified that, right?

"I have to go" I said not answering him and brushing past his tall figure. I didn't look back and I don't think he watched me go anyway.

Sid's POV:

I watched her walk away torn between going after her and forcing her to listen to me while feeling simultaneously defeated. I just had to open my big mouth and tell her that she looks terrible before trying to get her to talk to me. Way to go, Crosby.

Why did she have to be so difficult? She never seemed this hostile before and I had known her for a long time. A few years at least since she was almost a permanent fixture in the Lemieux family. Despite this, I didn't know a whole lot about her- except now I knew she was stubborn as hell and that I made her angry.

To be honest, I had never really paid a lot of attention to her. She was just there, always in the perimeter and the only real things I knew about her was that she didn't have a good relationship with her parents who were a little flaky and hardly ever around while she was growing up.

I didn't even know how her family knew the Lemieuxs, I just always saw her with Mario and Nathalie who she called her Aunt and Uncle.

Obviously they were close, so how did I still not know anything about her?

When I asked Jordan about it last night, his response had been "Dude, seriously you're a jerk. We're all friends with her except for you" before turning his attention back to the TV show we were watching. Needless to say, that hadn't been helpful and I still hadn't gotten any closer to figuring her out. I guess I could admit that I hadn't exactly been nice to her in the past. She was just too much of something that I couldn't put a label on. Too nice, too vibrant with that red hair of hers- too much of everything that overwhelmed me. It was just easier to brush her off and pretend she wasn't there. When she was still in college, it was easy but now this season when she started working for the team, it seemed like she was everywhere at once and it was getting harder and harder to avoid her.

Well, until now when all of the sudden, she wanted nothing to do with me and I felt like a shitty person for obviously upsetting her even though she kept trying to brush it off. Maybe it was the way I was raised or the fact that I have a little sister, but I can't stand it when women are mad at me. Right now especially, I felt like the lowest of the low and she was making it particularly difficult for me to apologize so that we could both move on. I was even willing to sign back up for her program if it meant she would forgive me and stop looking so angry with me.

I wasn't a miracle worker by any means but I could at least try to make amends with her. If she'll let me.


Eliza's POV:



"Thank you so much for your time- I know the kids are going to love this program. Call me if you have more questions, if not, I will be in touch when I have further information." I shook the hand of one of the YMCA directors in downtown Pittsburgh and made my escape. The woman had given me some great leads of different foster homes and after-school programs in the area that had kids who needed help and attention. I glanced at my watch and noted that I could probably make it back to my office and get more work done until the game tonight. It wasn't worth the hassle of running home and changing when I could just stay and get ahead on compiling as much information together as I needed to keep showing the directors in charge of charitable events that I had this under control. I didn't like it, but I was going to have to have some sort of fundraising event to make enough money for the program. The yearly Skates and Plates event was the biggest one that all of the Pens committed to but were they really willing to do another event like that? The guys hated getting dressed up- possibly with the exception of Max Talbot but he was unique anyway. Maybe a little sweet-talking and teary eyes would help me win my case on this one.

It was after 5pm so I knew that I was safe to return to my office without another run-in with Sidney. He would be too busy with pre-game stuff allowing me to safely navigate around Mellon Arena. I rolled my eyes when I passed some fans already loitering in front of the gates with "MARRY ME SID" signs. Honestly, did they even expect him to notice those signs? When he played hockey, he noticed nothing but the game around him and those girls were fools if they thought he appreciated them.

There I was getting bitter again for no reason. My mood was never this terrible and I hated that he was getting to me when he shouldn't be. As if on cue, to distract me from more Sidney-related thoughts, my phone began vibrating on my desk next to where I was working on my computer.

"Emma?" I felt relieved when I noticed that it was Nathalie Lemieux on the other end.

"Hi Aunt Nat. What's up?"

"Emma you sound terrible, what's wrong?" Jeez, did I really sound that horrible that everyone had to make a comment about it.

"I just woke up with a cold or something this morning, that's all."

"Well I was calling to see if you were joining us at the game tonight. We're going out to dinner afterwards and would love if you came with us." My heart warmed a little at her invitation. Despite my shitty experiences with family, Mario and Nathalie gave me hope that not all parents of privilege were as neglectful as mine. I agreed and hung up before turning off my phone ensuring that there would be no more interruptions for the rest of the evening.

I didn't come up for air until quarter to 8 when I finally realized how late it had gotten. I never missed the puck drop and turned on my phone to see 8 messages from Vero, Eliza and Nat and sadly even one from Mario making sure that I was still alive. I quickly packed up stifling the dizziness I felt from getting up too fast and closed up my office. I didn't feel well enough to be there but I also didn't want to miss the rest of the game. The Caps were here tonight and hands down, Pens/Caps games were my favorite to watch. Even though the Pens had my heart, I couldn't help but give props to Ovechkin based on his agility alone. Pittsburgh was biased and would of course stick by Sidney but that didn't mean that I couldn't recognize that Ovechkin was one talented player.

"Oh my god, where were you? The game started already!" Vero cried out spotting me when I entered the owner's box. It had become our custom to sit up here due to the high occupancy levels of games and overall, it was easier to watch the game from up above where you could see everything.

"Sorry, I shut my phone off and got carried away, I'm here now" I said pulling out tissues from my bag.

I avoided more questions about my general health and watched the game unfold trying not to concentrate on a certain player's moves like I usually would. I couldn't help it though, he was hypnotizing on the ice but I entertained myself with Ovechkin's on-ice antics. He always seemed to play it up for the crowds more in cities that hated him, namely Pittsburgh.

"So are you coming for dinner tonight?" Nathalie asked sliding into the chair next to me. I nodded because I splitting my concentration between the game below us and what she was telling me. My ears perked up upon hearing Sidney's name.

"Sidney's coming with us?" Since when had he ever joined us after games? It was customary for all the guys to go out and party after games. Nathalie looked confused at my obvious protest.

"He backed out of joining her new charity program and she yelled at him and now they're awkward around each other" Vero supplied from where she had joined us.

"It's a little more complicated than that" I said rolling my eyes at Vero's comment. She grinned at me instead before cheering for Marc who had just made a big save.

"Sidney did what?" Nathalie said looking at me curiously.

"It's not a big deal, really." This was officially the subject that was never going to die and now it was getting out of hand. How hard should it be to avoid Sidney for the rest of forever- apparently very hard.

I went into another sneezing and hacking fit and decided enough was enough. Everyone was looking at me in fear like I had tuberculosis and I couldn't handle being there anymore. The mellon was cold damn it.

"I'm going to go home and rest instead" I said saying goodbye and gathering up my stuff. No one protested to me leaving and all I wanted to do was go home and curl up in bed and sleep for the next 12-14 hours.

Tomorrow would be the good day I had been fantasizing about for the past 48 hours.

Chapter 2

Thanks to everyone for the feedback on this story so far! I appreciate it because like everyone else, it gets me excited to write. It was hard to finish this chapter because I took a break from writing to finally watch videos of Sid with the cup and couldn't stop laughing at the video of him washing the cup not because of Sid, but because of that creepy and swanky music they were playing in the background. The music made the video a little awkward and oddly seedy. All in all, very entertaining for someone as deranged as I am. Enjoy!

Emma's POV:

I was just pulling a tank-top over my sweat pants when the doorbell rang signalling that a few of the guys were here. I had made homemade mac and cheese casserole hoping that the carb fest would give them food comas and magically commit to all of the events I had planned to get the new program up and running. However, you can't just invite certain people. I of course needed Max and Marc to come over so then that meant that Vero and Eliza were coming too. Joining them would be Jordan, Kris, TK and Geno- though I wasn't completely sure he would know what was going on.

I was glad that it was just my friends coming meaning I could wear my comfy clothes and my red hair in pig tails without feeling childish. I opened the door to see Max, Eliza and Vero on the other side.

"Hey girl!" Max greeted me kissing my cheek and walking past me in the foyer straight into my kitchen where the food was.

"Hey hun. He obviously has a one-track mind" Eliza rolled her eyes going after Max and yelling at him not to eat yet. They had moved in together only a few weeks ago and since then, they had become even more sickeningly happy.

"Marc's coming. He was hanging out with some of the guys and they're driving over together" Vero said giving me a quick hug.

"Oh, okay. You guys can help yourselves, I just pulled the Mac and Cheese out of the oven" I said taking a stack of plates and forks out of the cabinets.

"So what's this new thing all about" Max asked already digging into the food.

"It's going to be a new program that I'm launching in affiliation with the Pens to promote events for underpriviledged kids to work with players for a day. I'm starting with the Pens but I'd really love it if other teams started doing this too." He nodded actually looking interested.

"Cool, count me in." I was happy that convincing him had taken almost no work and I happily rewarded him with a beer from the fridge.

"If you need someone to draw up legal documents or something, you know where to find me" Eliza spoke up scooping some of the cheesy goodness onto her plate. I smiled feeling so relieved to at least have some support that I was in a much better mood by the time the doorbell rang for a second time.

"Hey guys!" I said opening the door and letting the pack of guys in. I was so excited to see everyone that I didn't initially notice Sidney among the guys. As I received their hugs and pointed to where they could drop their shoes and coats, I froze noticing Sidney hanging back a bit looking around at what he could see so far of my house with his usual reserved expression on his face when he was around me. What the hell was he doing here? He was wearing a pair of jeans and one of his reebok sweatshirts with an old, beat up hat on and I had to scold my heart from reacting like it usually did to the sight of him.

Eliza skidded into the foyer looking panicked. "Uhhhhhh, Sidney! What are you doing here?" she asked nervously glancing between the two of us. I knew that I had a livid expression on my face and he was avoiding my gaze. Yeah, what was he doing here?

"I was invited?" he said not sounding sure of himself. I should have been enjoying this moment because he was always so perfectly in control of himself and situations and now he looked like he was finally feeling uncomfortable. Good. I felt the last shred of dignity and hold I had on my emotions snap when his brown eyes finally met mine. The same eyes I had been dreaming about for what seemed like forever now made me feel like I was going to vomit.

Eliza was about to say something when I cut her off. "You weren't invited by me" I said looking him straight in the eyes and pulling myself into my best strong posture. He looked shocked that I was actually speaking to him like this and I knew it was because he was used to me being friendly and easy-going. Like the doormat he assumed I was.

"This is a meeting for people committing to a charity program you backed out of. Therefore, you're not welcome here because there's no reason for you to be here" I said hoping he felt the scorn I was trying to burn him with from my eyes. Okay, so maybe I was overreacting just a little bit but I couldn't help it- he had pissed me off and damn it, I was going to let him know.

Eliza looked helpless standing between both of us as if she was a buffer and I did feel bad that she had to witness my bitch fit. Sidney on the other hand looked pissed but hey, at least he was showing me some emotion compared to the total lack of interest he usually gave me.

"Is this about today? Didn't Katrina call you and explain?" Who the hell was Katrina? If he was referring to the airhead that hadn't answered any of my questions and had blown me off on the phone, then maybe we were talking about Katrina.

"If you're referring to the woman who called to do your dirty work for you, then yes. And she told me what I needed to know" I told him putting my hands on my hips trying my best to look intimidating. I was of pretty average height but not terribly skinny and despite that, Sidney still seemed like a giant compared to me and I doubt that I scared him.

"What dirty work?" he asked. "I just can't commit to it right now and give it the attention that it needs. Playoff season's coming up." I looked at him incredulously. Was I out of my mind or was he actually listening to the crap that he was saying?

"Okay both of you, calm down. Sidney, you agreed when she asked you in the first place and would get a lot of PR for her so that's why she's pissed. You left her high and dry. And Em, calm down. He is the captain and it is going to be playoff season soon. You both need to respect each other's jobs" Eliza intervened trying to play peacemaker. The TV was on in the living room and I could hear some kind of a hockey game on with the guys discussing different plays. Sidney was staring at me like he had never seen me before and I was busy trying to imagine the floor opening me up and swallowing me whole. Anything to get me away from him because I just couldn't deal right now.

"Marc drove me over" Sidney mumbled looking like he would be happy to escape also. I rolled my eyes partly at my own bad luck because I knew that this meant he was stuck here seeing that I still needed to talk to Marc and make sure he would get involved with the program.

"Just stay. Food's in the kitchen" I said leaving the two of them in the foyer to run upstairs for a moment. I was still angry and needed a few minutes to compose myself before I joined everyone again and could get to work. I grabbed a sweatshirt to pull over my tank-top because the fight had had the opposite effect on me and I was now freezing. One more thing I can blame on him.

"Em, I'm so sorry" Marc immediately materialized by my side when I walked back into the kitchen. "I didn't know that he wasn't supposed to be here."

"Marc, it's okay. I know" I said smiling and handing him a beer from the fridge. Sidney was in the living room with everyone else not eating anything and watching me. When I looked over he turned focusing back on the game on TV.

"He feels bad you know" Marc whispered still waiting for me. I sighed not knowing what to say. Marc was one of Sidney's closest friends and it wasn't like I could tell him exactly how big of an asshole I found his best friend to be.

"Well, he's made it obvious that he doesn't like me anyway. He'll get over it" I said pushing past him and into the living room. I hated that I had become that bitter girl in such a short amount of time. Guys had never made me this bitter before but I guess there's a first for everything.

I walked into the living room and settled on the floor in front of the TV hoping that I would get their attention away from the hockey game. It was awkward to do this with Sidney here but I had to suck it up if I wanted this to go well.

"So guys, can we talk about the program?" I began pointedly ignoring Sidney who was still staring at me. Why was he staring so much- he had noticed that I had a face before, right?

"We're all down" Max spoke up. I looked around to see all of the guys nodding and agreeing.

"Wait, so that's it? You're all on board with the program for the next few months?" I asked still in disbelief that they didn't even require real bribing or convincing.

"Yeah, it sounds like a great idea Emma" Kris spoke up. His eyes darted between me and the hockey game behind me. I should have known.

"So can I give you all information later this week and a heads up about events I'll need you for?" They all nodded and I settled back content to let them stick around and watch the game. Part of me was ecstatic that this program was most likely going to be a huge success because I had great guys committed but the other part of me was still feeling unsettled. I tried not to let what had happened earlier with Sidney ruin my current feeling of relief but I knew it wasn't worth it. I really needed to go to bed and sleep off my mood so that I could wake up and have that great day tomorrow that I had been fantasizing about all afternoon.

"I'm sorry" Sid said simply rubbing the back of his neck looking uncomfortable once again.

I had waited a bit and then gone into the kitchen to load the dishwasher and clean up. When everyone went home, I wanted to be all ready to go directly to bed because I had a big day ahead of me tomorrow. Now the kitchen that was supposed to be my refuge had been infiltrated by the person I was trying to get away from. Weeks ago I would have been absolutely ecstatic that he was paying so much attention to me. Now look where you are.

"Just drop it. I accept your apology." It was easier just to lie for the sake of avoiding another fight. I was tired and didn't care enough to get into it again with him.

"You're still mad though" he said pulling out a chair at the kitchen island and settling into it. Again, I was confused as to why he was still following me suddenly interested and apparently bothered by the fact that I was mad at him. "I can tell because you keep rubbing your temples. You only do that when you're angry."

I looked at him surprised and dropped my hand from where it had been rubbing the tension away from my head. How had he noticed that? He laughed at the expression on my face and I vaguely registered that this was one of the first times I had seen him laugh around me. Remembering this soured my mood again and for the second time that day, I wished for some sort of cliff to push him off of.

"Seriously, just let it go, okay? Have a good rest of the season." I said this intending to leave the kitchen but his arm grabbed my wrist preventing me from making a grand exit past him.

"Thanks but what are you talking about? You sound like you're saying goodbye or something" he said looking at me with one of his creepy intense expressions. Like the look he has on his face when he wants to take down Ovechkin or a pesky reporter.

Wasn't I saying a goodbye of sorts? Today had been a huge eye-opener for me and I had resolved not to waste anymore time or energy on Sidney Crosby with wishful thinking or even trying to be his friend. He had been resisiting me all along and I was too annoyed to continue doing this to myself.

We were both silent and I pointedly looked down at the wrist he was still holding until he clued in and let go. As I walked away, I made sure to remind myself that my arm definitely wasn't still tingling from where he had been holding me. Definitely wasn't.

Chapter 1

Yay first chapter! I will probably write another one today, hopefully a longer one and Mr. Crosby will finally make an appearance.
If you want a music suggestion while you read this and relax, music that has been inspiring this whole story while it sat in my brain for a month or two have been Lady Gaga's "Brown Eyes" all of Imogen Heap's songs (and Frou Frou) and now Charlotte Sometimes and her CD. I've been really into Lady Gaga though as of late because it is good girl power music and that's what Emma needs right now :D

Emma's POV:


I had never disliked him more than I did in that moment. How could he just drop the charity event like that? My mind was racing and I was trying my hardest to focus on what the voice on the phone was telling me and not the fact that my heart felt like someone had just stuck it in a blender.

While I was hurt, I was more angry with him than I had been with anyone for a very, very long time. This was a defining moment for me considering I had been head over heels infatuated with him since the first time I had met him four years ago when he was a newbie in the NHL living with my parent's closest friends, The Lemieuxs.

Now as far as I was concerned, Sidney Patrick Crosby could suck it or go fall off of a cliff. Either one would put me in a better mood provided I could watch and possibly get a video copy of it for further entertainment at a later time.

"So he's not willing to commit to this event at all? Did he tell you why?" I was talking to the dreaded agent's assistant who didn't seem willing to fill me in on any details about the event that I had planned and that had been my baby for the past month. I was so unimportant that I didn't even get to speak to his agent Pat, I just got stuck with the assistant.

The assistant gave me another half-assed excuse and shooed me off the phone leaving me in the same place I was ten minutes ago. Completely screwed. I hung up and took a minute to rest my forehead on my desk and take deep breaths. The Children's Partnership Project had been my baby project, and my first big solo assignment since I had become one of the directors on the charity and events board for the Pens organization. I had been steadily working my way up and garnering respect among my colleagues for the past year when I was just a newbie college grad who had connections. A lot of the older directors had looked down upon me thinking that I had only gotten the job because I was close with the Lemieuxs but I had been working my ass off to prove them wrong only to completely fail at my first real project before it got off the ground and running. Damn it, Crosby.

This was all his fault anyway. Before I had even gotten permission to start this project, I had made sure that he would be willing to participate and be an advocate for the group with the rest of the Pens backing it. He was famous and great with kids so he was my obvious first choice to spend a little time at charity events and promote hands-on activities for children in need to work with the Penguins. Sure, he had looked at me like I was invisible like he always did but he had agreed nonetheless and I had let it go foolishly thinking that he would keep his promise.

That in itself was the real problem with all of this. I actually believed in him despite the fact that I wasn't worth noticing to him even though he saw me often and that he had resisted all of my attempts at friendship with him. I had never understood this but eventually gave up after I got tired of the pitying looks everyone around us was starting to give me. Everyone else liked me on the team! Was it so ridiculous of me to believe that him and I could be friends too?

Apparently it was because even though we had known each other for years and had worked together for the past year, I still wasn't interesting enough for the great Sidney Crosby to deign to speak to and keep a damn promise that he had made. How had I overlooked that he was never going to miraculously change his mind and finally start paying attention to me?

Well, it had taken me years but I certainly understood now and definitely wasn't going to cry about it anymore. Or cry over him anymore.

"Em? Are you okay?" I looked up from my position still face down on the desk and was startled to realize that I had been crying without realizing it. Epic fail. Eliza, one of my best friends and a lawyer for the Pens was staring at me and looking worried, especially because I hadn't said anything yet.

"What happened?" she asked quickly shutting my office door and handing me a tissue from her enormous purse. Her boyfriend Max and I jokingly referred to it as her batman utility purse but even that couldn't make me smile right now.

"He backed out of working on the Children's Partnership Project" I grumbled wiping my eyes and trying to save my eye makeup.

"Huh?" she blinked in confusion. I waited for it to dawn on her and then she just looked pissed. "Sidney backed out? But I was there when you asked him! He said he would do it!" She looked just as outraged as I felt except now, in true Emma Weston fashion, I was starting to just feel sad.

I was more committed to this job than I was to anything else in my life and I loved waking up knowing that I could go to work and design projects and groups that made a difference in people's lives. I hated that he could make me feel lousy not only about my personal life, but also now my professional life. Damn him.

"I'm so sorry hun" Eliza said coming around the desk to kneel down and pry my forehead from the desk again.

"You know, Max would definitely do it and so would Jordan or Kris" she said referring to other players on the team. Her boyfriend Max Talbot was a big goofball but adored Eliza and kids in general. If she so much as mentioned it, he would do it just because he was that nice of a guy. Unlike someone else I know.

"Maybe. I'll talk to him about it later today. I already got Kris and Jordan to volunteer anyway. Sidney was just supposed to be the media guy we needed but Max is just as good with journalists anyway. He's probably the better choice in the long run." I was starting to feel better that no matter what, I did have the other guys on the team to back me and the project up.

"Wanna go to lunch? Blow off work for an hour or two?" I smiled and nodded knowing that comfort food was exactly what I needed right now and allowed myself to be distracted by Eliza's chatter.

Her and I had become fast friends since meeting months ago and our other good friend Vero was dating the goalie for the Pens making it easy for the three of us to see each other often and attend games. Also a part of my problem.

The more I watched him play hockey, the more I became infatuated with him. I didn't understand it but I just had an intense desire to know him since the first time I had laid eyes on him. It was all foolishness now and I wondered just how much time I had wasted over him for the past few years. Probably a pathetically large amount.

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" Eliza asked as we walked back into the arena after lunch. She had helped me brainstorm for more people to contact to help out since I now had to fill the void of Sidney leaving the program.
"Yeah, I'm determined to make this a sucess for the kids and the Pens with or without that asshole" I said feeling a burst of energy. I had to start over in more ways than one.
"Okay, make sure you call me if you need anything from Max or I" Eliza still looked wary of my sudden mood change but began the trek back to her office on the other side of the mellon.

As soon as she was gone, I resisted the urge to wallow for the rest of the afternoon and do meaningless paperwork. I couldn't do that now and I had to be stronger if I was going to make this program a success on my own. Like it or not, I had to realize that my fantasies about Sidney miraculously changing and noticing me were never going to happen. They were fantasies for a reason afterall.

First things first, I had to start actively exploring my other options to make the program work meaning I had to go beg and plead my case with the guys and get them completely on board with the events. It was after 2pm on a Tuesday afternoon and because there wasn't a game tonight and practice long over, I knew that I wouldn't be able to find any of the guys milling around. Inviting them over to my house for a homecooked meal and a little convincing was exactly what I needed to do. Boys, especially athletic boys, could always be won over with food.

Quiet doormat no more! I was taking charge and starting to feel more invigorated than I had in weeks by late afternoon when I actually needed to get home so that I could start dinner for the guys. When I had texted them earlier about coming over for a meal and a proposition, I had gotten responses quickly and joking texts over my use of the word "proposition." Thank god that the guys on the team were always so willing to help out and had become good friends over the past few months. At least I know I can count on them.

I had to stop myself from thinking bitter thoughts again and move forward. Today had sucked but I knew that tomorrow would be better simply because I wasn't going to let this program fail. If Sidney didn't have the sense or the compassion to help with the program simply because it was the right thing to do, then screw him. The program and I didn't need him anyway.