Chapter 19

I had an intense burst of creativity today and decided to whip out another chapter. I think you'll all like it :D

Sidney's POV:

Apparently patience wasn't really my best trait. I had sworn to myself that I would keep being patient with Emma but after she hadn't answered any of my texts during our roadtrip, I was ready to do what it took to make her speak to me again. Was she really that freaked out by me kissing her?  I was starting to worry that I had misread the signals and that she secretly hated kissing me and didn't want to make me feel bad.

And now I sounded like a girl while I internally struggled over what to do. It wasn't like I could tell anyone because no one I knew could keep a secret and if I told Marc anything he would tell Vero and she would tell Emma. Those two were practically attached at the hip and I couldn't imagine her keeping a secret from Emma if it involved something juicy.

That morning I had woken up with the intention of going to the rink early before practice at 10 and get some of my aggression out on the ice. Instead I had only made it through half of my usual routine before I found myself back where the whole mess had started- outside of her office door.

The rest of the staff had looked at me strangely when I entered the offices still dressed in my workout gear and probably looking suspicious considering there was no real need for me to be up here. Should I knock or turn around and wait until she came to me?

Who was I kidding? She was avoiding me for a reason and wouldn't come to me until I confronted her about it. All girls, even the good ones like Emma, worked like that. They made us suffer without even knowing it.

I knocked on the door before I could change my mind again and waited until I heard the faint sound of her voice telling me to come in. I opened the door and tried not to let the look of shock on her face annoy me. She masked it quickly and flashed a smile smoothing down the front of her blouse.

"Hey Sid, what can I do for you?"

Sid? She never called me Sid. Not even when we weren't friends. She was one of the few people in my life that did call me Sidney aside from my grandmothers.

"Is your phone broken?" I asked trying to cut through her mask of defense. If she thought that she was getting away this time, she was wrong.
"My phone?" She asked obviously playing dumb. She had never been a good liar. Even if it occassionally worked with other people, it didn't work on me.
"Yeah, I've called and left a message and sent you a bunch of texts. And you didn't reply to any of them."

She opened her mouth to speak and then sighed loosing one layer of her composure.
"I've been busy and I got your message but then I figured you would be too busy on the road to talk."

That was a logical enough reason but she still obviously didn't want to talk to me. Somehow not talking to Emma for a week was a million times worse than not talking to anyone else- my current girlfriend included.

"So can we talk now? Either that or come over to dinner tonight so that we can talk then. I'm tired of you avoiding me."

She gave me another look and I cut her off before she could say anything else. "Don't try to deny it. You know you've been avoiding me." I knew that I was being a little too aggressive with her but once she was set on doing something, she was nearly unstoppable. And right now she was dead set on pretending like I didn't exist. The idea of that was crawling under my skin and bugging the hell out of me.

"Fine, dinner it is. But I won't be done until 7 so do you want me to just pick up the food on my way over?"

"Nope, don't worry about it. Just come over and I'll figure out dinner."

She nodded still looking at me warily and I told her that I would see her later before heading out to continue my workout downstairs. I didn't feel any better about the situation but at least she was talking to me. If she was talking to me and coming over for dinner, then that was a start. For now I had to strategize and take care of something important.

Emma's POV:

How was he able to pinpoint my actions so well? After barging into my office and looking annoyingly sexy in his workout clothes, he had zeroed right in on the fact that I had been avoiding him and somehow coerced me into having dinner with him.

I was a total failure at being a woman. Weren't women supposed to have control over men and not the other way around? Weren't we supposed to flutter our eyelashes and make everyone in the near vicinity with a penis fall to their knees? My own Mother could do it and had been doing it for years before my Dad wised up and caught on to her tricks.

The real problem here wasn't my lack of feminine wiles, it was that I was a pushover when it came to him and he always knew how to get past me. But that was old news. I had long gotten over the fact that when it came to Sidney Crosby, he was always going to have more control over me than I would over him.

Do you know how terrifying that realization is? To realize that someone literally has that much control over my actions and thoughts? It would be unhealthy if I wasn't a productive member of society and if we weren't strictly friends with one measly kiss between us. What was that old saying in black and white movies? 'What's a kiss between friends?'

That phrase became my mantra as I worked the rest of the day to distract myself from my own wandering mind. By 6pm I realized that I had exaggerated my workload and was browsing the internet reading news articles just to pass the time so that I didn't show up on his doorstep too early. I could at least save my dignity by not appearing too eager and showing up on his doorstep before 7pm.

Finally after reading weather forecasts for Pittsburgh and other random cities a million times, I turned off the lights in my office and headed out to my car. On the way over I tried not to psych myself out by worrying too much about he wanted to talk about. The naive part of me still wanted to believe that he just wanted to discuss charity or hockey with me. Anything but the kiss we had shared. I didn't think that my heart or my head could handle listening to him apologize and give me a random reason why he did it.

When I pulled up outside of his house, it was all lit up with one of the garage doors open so that I could pull my car in and get into the house. I had been to his house hundreds of times before following this exact same routine of letting myself into his house. So why did I suddenly feel like I needed to knock before entering?

The garage door leading into the house opened revealing Sidney standing there telling me something that I couldn't hear because I was still sitting in my running car. He knocked on the window motioning for me to put it down.
"I said, are you ever going to get out of your car? It's been like 5 minutes."
I blushed feeling irritable and embarrassed about how we were both acting and fumbled to turn everything off and detach myself from the car. He was waiting patiently and staring at me as I finally got out of the car.

He looked at me for another moment and gave me a small smile telling me to follow him into the house.
"I ordered chinese food for us."

"Okay, that sounds good" I said finally speaking up and thanking god when my voice sounded normal. How did he always look so good when I managed to look like a disaster at the end of a work day? In the very least he shouldn't wear such tight shirts that show off his broad shoulders so well.

"Wait, why is your vase missing?" I noticed it immediately as we entered the kitchen and saw that his tacky, ornamental vase was mysteriously gone. His grandma had given it to him as a house warming gift and we always laughed about how tacky it was even though he always left it out in the middle of the large kitchen island. It was a staple to his non-existent décor.

"Oh" he said looking angry. "Christine tried to heave it at me."

My jaw dropped in shock as I comprehended what he had just told me. She was not only completely awful but also abusive? "What?!"

"Yeah, we got into another argument and she tried to throw it at me but she couldn't lift it so instead it just fell and broke."

"Oh my god, Sidney. That's terrible! I mean the vase was horrible but it belonged here on the counter." How could she do that? If I didn't hate her already, I hated her now for not appreciating that his grandmother had given it to him as a present!

"It doesn't matter now, she's gone now" he said pulling chinese cartons out of the big, paper bag.

"Good. I wouldn't want to be here if she was still lingering around after that." Having dinner with both of them would be beyond terrible.

He laughed and handed me a plate with a carton of the lo mein he had ordered for me. "No, I mean she's gone. I broke up with her."

I tried to act non-chalant while internally berating myself for being so stupid. Of course he meant that they had broken up. But why? Weren't they thinking of moving in together? He hadn't seemed thrilled about the idea exactly but he never told me what he was going to do.

"She just didn't take the news very well" Sidney added taking his own cartons with him to the living room leaving me to follow him in astonishment.

I grabbed two waters from the fridge before following him. He was already stretched out on the couch not leaving me a lot of room to sit with distance between us and of course, a taping of last week's "Hockey Night in Canada" already on. Strangely, even though I got more than enough hockey during the day time, I liked watching recaps with Sidney. Maybe it was unhealthy that hockey was his job and also the only thing he watched on TV if it wasn't a movie or Friends, but he never seemed to tire of it and I was always entertained just from listening to the sportscasters. I handed him his drink and plopped down careful to put some space between us. Unfortunately the cushions which are normally so comfortable, angled down leaving me sitting closer to him than I would have liked and I sat uncomfortably on an angle.

"So what did you need to talk to me about?" I asked finally breaking the silence between us. How could I enjoy my food when he was just sitting there and not telling me why I was there in the first place?

"Do you know what you're doing for Christmas yet?" He said still focusing on the TV screen.

I wanted to groan and then smack him for bringing me here for that. I was Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide with my emotions all over the place. I didn't want to talk about the kiss but I wanted to. I didn't want to be here with him right now but I did. I wanted to ask him why he had really broken up with the Viper but I couldn't form the words.

"We talked about that. I really think that you should spend the holidays with your family Sidney. You guys don't need an intruder there also" I replied staying calm and trying to keep my face completely passive.

"But you're not going to be an intruder. And I am going to spend the holidays with my family for a few days but I don't see why you won't come with me. You're the only one that is finding anything wrong with this idea."

He looked frustrated with me again almost like he wanted to say something else to me but was holding himself back. If he would just say what he wanted to say, then maybe we wouldn't be frustrated with each other right now.

"Well I don't understand why you won't just accept 'thanks but no thanks' as an answer and let it go." I was getting defensive now and a headache was forming between my eyes. I hated fighting with him and that's all we seemed to be doing lately- almost like we weren't friends at all.

He didn't answer my question. Instead he shook his head at me and got up from the couch, walking into the kitchen leaving me stunned that he had actually chosen to ignore me and just left like that. I don't think so buddy.

"Sidney Patrick Crosby, don't you dare walk away from me." I said following him and channeling my inner-mother. He stood with his back facing me at the sink rinsing off his plate and loading it into the dishwasher still ignoring me.
"Okay listen" I said poking him hard in the back. "You're the one that made me come to dinner tonight and now you don't even want to have a conversation with me. You just want to talk and I'm apparently expected to just fall into line." After years of dealing with my parents, I hated when no one listened to me and just expected me to bend to their whim and will. Sidney was at least supposed to respect me and not do that to me. He was supposed to understand when I said no and not just walk away like I was incapable of understanding.

I poked him again for good measure causing him to turn around and grab my wrist to prevent me from jabbing him again. "Stop poking me" he growled looking at me like I was an annoyance. I hated that. I wanted him to look at me and be just as angry as I was in that moment- not look at me think of me as an inconvenience or like a little kid that needs to be sent away.

"Stop ignoring me when I tell you 'no' or when I explain why I don't want to go home with you."

His grip on my wrist tightened holding me in place in front of him. "I will when you stop giving me bullshit excuses all of the time." He grabbed my other wrist as it went in for the kill to stab him again pulling us closer together. I didn't even care because I was so angry at him that this time, the closeness of our bodies wasn't affecting me like it normally would.

"I invited you home with me because my family is warm and loving- something that I know your family is not. I just wanted to make sure that you enjoyed Christmas this year and knew that you would with my family.That's it. No hidden agenda or ulterior motive."

We stood there in silence after he had finished. His grip had loosened on my wrists and the pads of his thumbs were tracing gentle circles over the pulse in my wrists. Did I believe him? It was hard not to especially since he no longer looked like he wanted to throttle me.

"So what's your excuse now? Go ahead, I really want to hear what you'll make your new excuse of why you can't just enjoy the holidays with my family?"

I stiffened feeling the nice thoughts I was thinking about him disappear and be replaced with anger again at his words. Of course he had to go and ruin the moment like that.

"You know, I was about to say that I would think about it or say yes when you had to go and-" I started to yell at him and pull out of his hold completely when his arm slipped around my waist to my lower back crushing me against him. His lips were on mine before I could finish my sentence and my traitorous lips instantly responded to his. This time was different. Where our first kiss had been short and sweet, this kiss was rough and building quickly into a battle of wills as he gained control and I fought to keep up with him. His strong hand pressed my lower back towards him as we met core to core. His lips were still moving smoothly over mine as he switched our positions and hitched me up to sit on the countertop behind us. My legs parted instantly allowing him full access between them as he continued to attack my mouth and rub his hand up over my blouse to rest beneath my breast. I gasped, eyes nearly rolling into the back of my head as his teeth scraped along my jawline and my hands jumped to his shoulders as I tightened my legs around his waist. He groaned at the new contact and broke the kiss letting our breath mix together in the limited space between us.

"What just happened?" I asked feeling almost dazed. No kiss had ever thrown me off my sanity like this one had- even our previous, perfect kiss.

"You said yes" he said smiling and placing his lips on mine again, this time at a gentler rate.

Okay so I hadn't exactly said yes but his lips felt so wonderful on mine that for once, I let it go choosing to live in the moment instead and find answers later.