Chapter 24

Seriously, you guys are so amazing. Thank you so much for sticking by my story with me and still reading even though I've been slow to update lately. Also, I love all of your comments so much and how supportive they are. I literally did a happy dance this morning when I looked today and realized how many followers I have. That's amazing and so lovely :) Enjoy the chapter.


Emma's POV:

I wake up the next morning to white light and the sound of the creepy salesguy selling a "Slap-Chop" on TV.

It isn't until I shift attempting to find the remote that I realize I'm not alone in bed and nor is it really my bed. I'm also pinned down by the weight of a leg draped heavily over mine and the feeling of warm breath puffing lightly on my neck as my face is burrowed into someone's chest. I can't help but smile contentedly when I realize it's Sidney wrapped around me in bed. A year ago I would have had a heart attack if this had been happening to me or I would have laughed. Or both. But now, it's real. And I grin even more when I realize how much of a cuddler he is.

From my past experience with men, there's a definite difference in how men sleep next to a woman. Sure, it's nice when a guy wants to share his space and sleep next to you all night. It shows a level of respect and commitment and in the very least says "hey, I like you enough to not have sex with you and then leave." But even within this category, there's a difference with how men sleep next to a woman. Some guys wrap a light arm around you and some women mistake this and tell their girlfriends how they were "held" all night long, mistaking the gesture for true affection. Being held is different. There's a level of affection that transcends the respect he has for not leaving you immediately after sex. When he holds you, he's letting you know that he actually cares. Something about the way that his hands hold your body in place and how his hands curl around your skin says more than anything else that he's capable of expressing. You just know that you're cared for by this person and it's miraculous.

I try my hardest not to apply my own theory of holding to my current situation or dwell on the fact that no man has ever held me like he's holding me, even though we merely fell asleep together. Or rather I fell asleep first but still, we're still here and it's his arms holding me in place tightly against his body and keeping me warm. In fact, he's holding me so tightly that I have to crane my head around to try to see where a clock is in the room. I'm positive we both forgot to set an alarm last night and we are supposed to be at his parent's house early to eat breakfast and spend Christmas Eve with the rest of his family.

Gently picking up his wrist I examine the watch he neglected to take off the night before. When I read the time, my jaw drops open in surprise and I swear loudly.

"Shit! Sidney, wake up" I tell him panicking about how late it is. He ignores me rolling over onto his back and pulling me with him still deep in sleep. I never would have taken him for a guy that liked to sleep in given his dilligent workout schedule and his crazy normal schedule but here he is, ignoring me and snoring softly as he sleeps the morning away.

"Sidney" I repeat this time reaching out to brush hair from his forehead hoping my touch will wake him up. He doesn't stir and I'm forced to move onto slightly more violent tactics. I shove at his chest calling his name again until he jolts awake probably just as startled as I was to find out that I was not alone in bed.

"What? What happened?" he asks groggily, sending shivers down my spine with the thick sound of his voice.

"We didn't set an alarm" I inform him already missing the heat of his body as we both sit up and I climb out of bed. "I can hurry if you can hurry" I tell him watching him rub the sleep from his eyes and blink at me silently.

"What time is it?" He asks propping himself up so that he can pick up the clock ticking idly on his nightstand. "Shit! Okay, 20 minutes?" he asks me. I nod and take off rushing into the shower and hoping for a miracle that will allow me to get ready and still look decent in such a short amount of time. 20 minutes later I'm not entirely sure that I've washed all of the shampoo out of my hair but I'm clean and I think I look nice enough to spend the day in his family's company again. In the daylight, I take in Sidney's house again enjoying the simple colors and how airy and big all of the rooms seem to be. It's not a big house but it seems larger with the high ceilings and windows that line up along the back of the house, overlooking all of the water.

"Ready for day two?" I hear him question as he appears behind me smiling and handing me a to-go cup of coffee. In my rush this morning, I hadn't wondered what we would do now after our talk last night. Do we kiss each other good morning? Do we pretend that it never happened? Even though my mind is running a mile a minute, Sidney answers my questions by reaching over and pulling me closer. His eyes are on mine as he kisses me slowly, letting me languish in the moment and the feeling of his tongue gliding with ease over mine.

He pulls away and I'm about to question it and probably whine about it when I realize that he's laughing.

"What?" I ask not finding the distance between our mouths funny at all.

"I just wanted to make sure that we really did talk last night" he jokes ducking away from me when I try to hit his arm.

"Just to punish you, I should pretend that I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You wouldn't do that, you're too nice to play games" he says shaking his head at me and egging our little banter on.

"Try me, Crosby" I challenge feeling ecstatic that it's me who has the priviledge of flirting with him on a cold, beautiful morning.

"I'd rather not risk it right now" he says shrugging into his coat and leading me out to his car. More snow has fallen over night leaving the SUV's windshields covered up in snow. Between the two of us we're able to uncover the car in a few minutes and are surprisingly on the road only 5 minutes late so far.

"Do you think we should call and let them know we'll be late?"

"Hmm?" he asks taking his eyes off of the road to glance at me. "Why would we call?" he asks again. Why wouldn't we call is what I want to know.

"Won't your Mom be mad?" I ask genuinely puzzled by the fact that he's not thinking about this at all.

"Nah, it's not really a big deal" he shrugs turning the heat up higher in the car. "We're not that late and they'll understand."

I lean back in the seat relaxing now that I remember that Sidney's family is actually nice. They'll understand if we're a little late for breakfast because they're normal. Unlike my parent's who would have already started without us if we were late and then lectured us for the rest of the meal on the merits of punctuality. "Oh" is all I say choosing to keep my mouth shut and enjoy being around a normal family other than the Lemieuxs for once.

When we pull up to the house, it's Sidney who groans at the sight of all of the cars lined up and down the street and bumper to bumper in front of the house. "It's too early for all of this" he whines turning the car off and removing the keys from the ignition.

"What are you talking about?" Didn't he know all of these people were coming? Even I knew since Taylor had filled me in the day before, giving me the who's who of the Crosby clan.

"No, I knew." He sighs and there's just enough behind the sigh to make me worry a little bit. "They're going to ask you a million questions" he says making it sound more like a warning than anything else.

"And I guess I'll have to have a million answers " I respond still curious as to why he's acting this way.

"No, I mean they'll want to know why I brought you with me. They're a lot less subtle that my parents and Taylor."

"Oh" I say realizing that we're moving back into complicated territory again. We agreed to take things slow and not put labels on anything but how are we supposed to do that when a situation like this demands a label? "We'll just tell them the truth" I say stepping in front of him. "We're friends no matter what so we'll stick with that."

"I just don't want them to make you uncomfortable" he says still looking very serious.

"I'll be fine, seriously" I reassure him grinning at the expression on his face. "Sidney, I'm serious. It's your family- not a war zone."

"That's what you think" he replies dryly leading me up the front steps where I can already hear a million voices chattering away inside. "We should have an 'abort' signal if you need air at any point during the day."

"You're a child" I say hanging my coat up next to his in the closet by the front door. He pretends to be offended by this and tugs on the ends of my hair teasing me and proving my point exactly as we laugh and walk into the kitchen where everyone's gathered and fighting for food.

I'm introduced by Mrs. Crosby who now has me calling her Trina and I'm quickly separated from Sidney and absorbed into the group of women and their family gossip. The morning flies by and I realize that Sidney wasn't exaggerating when he told me they would pry into my personal life and crack it open like a can of tuna. They really did want to know all about me and weren't shy about insinuating why I was there to Trina. At my constant looks of embarrassment, Trina would merely smile at me and wink before helping me out and trying to change the subject. Taylor, who has become my only other pillar of support, also finds my despair hilarious and nudges me constantly, covering her mouth with her hand so she can laugh about what they're saying.

"He's never brought a girl home before ya know" Trina's sister and Sidney's aunt leans over to tell me conspiratorally. "Not even when he was still in high school. He just never introduced us to one of his girls before." She said this as if I was supposed to feel special but even before last night happened, I knew that Sidney was only brining me home with him because of his do-gooder attitude. But since these women really didn't need to know the history of our long and complicated friendship, I kept my mouth shut.

Despite their intrusive questions and the fact that my face has now retained a permanent blush, I'm having fun with these women and doing something I've never done before with the exception of Nathalie Lemieux and my friends- just sit around and talk about nothing and drink coffee all morning. I'm having so much fun I hardly notice when Sidney enters the room until suddenly I feel all eyes on me as the ladies obviously wait for something to happen.

"Want to go for a walk?" he asks after greeting everyone and focusing his attention on me.

"Dinner's in an hour so don't go far" Trina warns, not even factoring in the fact that I haven't said 'yes' or 'no' yet.

"We'll be back soon" Sidney promises leaving me no choice but to nod and follow him out of the room. Not that it's much of a hardship to go for a walk with him but it would be nicer to know that we could just go for a walk and not have all of them gossiping about us when we leave. Although, I guess that's what Sidney deals with every day only it's strangers talking about him rather than just family.

After getting our coats on, we start off down the street in silence watching the puffs of air from our breath fan out in front of us.

"I like your family" I say smiling at some of the stories they had told me about him that morning. "They told me about a certain hair dying faze you were in" I tease referencing his time as a kid when one of his teams used to die their hair during playoff games. Everyone else's had come out normal and Sidney's hadn't.

"I was 15!" he says defending himself. His shoulder nudges mine and our hands brush before finally clasping on to each other.

"I wonder what the women of Pittsburgh would do if you re-created your Ronald McDonald hair" I question watching the grin bloom on his face.

"Maybe some of them would finally leave me alone" he jokes rolling his eyes and leading me down a different street.

We keep walking and he points out different places he used to go to as a kid, including where he used to play roller hockey with friends. It's nice being able to walk around with him and relax knowing that he's relaxed in my company also. I'm enjoying this now but I know it won't last forever. Eventually we will have to return to Pittsburgh and someone will have to press play on our lives again, making them resume their normal craziness.

"What's wrong?" he asks still holding my hand in his larger one. The simplicity of the moment is perfect and I don't want to ruin it by confessing that I'm already plagued with doubt about how this is going to work even though we've only both agreed to start addressing whatever's between us. How can you be doubtful of something that's not even a relationship? 

He's looking down at me like he doesn't believe me and I want to reassure him that everything's okay by smiling and allowing him to pull me closer as an arm slides around my waist protecting me from the wind as we keep walking, beginning the trek back to his house.

"Everything's fine" I tell him forcing doubts out of my mind. I have no reason to even be worrying right now and the sane side of me acknowledges this. I just wonder how long it will be before I start to worry again and what I'll do when we're no longer in peaceful Canada, outside of the chaotic space that we're both used to in Pittsburgh.