Chapter 35

Ugh, I'm sorry for the extremely long delay. I go through bursts of creativity where chapters come together really easily for me and then I go through dry spells where I can't think of anything to say or any way to write at all. It doesn't help that it's the end of the year and I'm slowly going insane with my work schedule, classes and also Finals.

Hopefully you all enjoy this chapter. I was planning on ending this story soon but now I'm not so sure. It's oddly difficult for me to write about these two and is probably the reason I've been working on this story for 8-ish months now.

It'll end when it ends I guess :)



"Crash Into Me" - Stevie Nicks' version

Sid's POV:

The alarm went off the next morning at its prescribed time, indicating that I had to get up, shower and get off to the airport. This wasn't unlike any other morning during a season but this time it was harder to go.

I shifted trying to get out of bed without waking Emma up but her body curled into mine tighter and prevented me from moving. Just when I thought she was still asleep, she mumbled "5 more minutes" and none too gently tugged my body back down next to hers. Sliding her legs between mine and warming her feet on my legs, she kept her eyes closed as her breathing slowed back down again.

Her mouth parted slightly while she slept and her long eyelashed fanned small shadows underneath her eyes. Just looking at her was enough to make a nerve twinge and my stomach roll uncomfortably for no reason at all.

Moments like these made me wish that I didn't have so many obligations to my career. Wouldn't life be easier if I didn't have a job that kept me out on the road 8 months out of the year?

But then again, I wouldn't love my life as much and I probably wouldn't know the woman currently sleeping next to me if my job hadn't brought me to Pittsburgh. Hell, I would probably still be back in Nova Scotia fishing or something.

But still, wouldn't I be able to give Emma more if I wasn't constantly gone playing hockey? Didn't she deserve more than someone who could only give her snippets of time during the week and sometimes no time at all?

"Stop thinking so much" My head turned slightly at the sound of her voice- she should still be sleeping.

"I think I can hear you worrying" she mumbled nestling her head into the crook of my neck and sending goosebumps all over my body with little puffs of breath. "Do you have to get up now?" she asked tightening her arm around me. She was my anchor keeping me in place in bed and grounding me from everything else I actually had to worry about.

Would we make the playoffs this year? Would I ever get the chance to win the cup again or was it all over for me now that I had even had it once? How would the team change when contracts were up at the end of the season? All of these things frequented my mind but as I lay in the dark, Emma was slowly stroking all of these worries away.

"No, I don't have to get up yet" I lied turning my head away from the clock to watch her sleepy figure.

"Good" she mumbled pressing a chaste kiss to the underside of my chin and falling back asleep. I tightened my hold on her body and pulled her closer, letting her warmth surround me.

I would pay for it later when I would have to skip breakfast and speed to the airport but for now, it felt like I should just lay here with her instead.


Emma's POV:

"I don't want you to leave" I mumbled pressing my face against his chest. I didn't care if I sounded like that whiny, awful girlfriend. I just wanted him to stay with me in bed for the rest of the day like other couples were allowed to spend their weekends.

"I know, I'm sorry" he said apologizing into my hair for the 3rd time. His grip around my waist tightened as we held onto each other in the hallway leading to the garage. As I laid my cheek on the cool fabric of his suit, I wondered whether I still had time to sneak out and slash his tires.

He gave me one more squeeze and gently pulled away, smoothing my tangle of bedhead away from my face gently. We both knew that he had to leave for the airport and for Boston but it sucked. Why did Zdeno Chara get to have him when I didn't? Suddenly I felt like the city of Boston was the most hateful and awful place in the world.

"I'll call you when I land" he reassured me and I silently hoped that he would. I still hadn't gotten around to talking to him about the importance of phone calls but it gave me hope to think that he would possibly start doing it on his own. I just wanted him to think about me the way I was always thinking about him. So what if I needed to hear his voice at least once a day. Was it so much to ask that he felt the same?

"Promise?"

He nodded and raised my chin gently in his hand to kiss my lips. His tongue stroked over the lines of my lips before delving in and sending a shiver down my spine. Our eyes watched each other as we kissed and amidst the flecks of hidden gold in his eyes, I saw that he would miss me too.

When he held me like this, I could almost believe that he loved me back. I felt privileged knowing that I was one of the few to see this gentle, caring side of him and be on the reciprocating end of his actions.

"Okay, you should go, you're already late" I told him taking a step back from his body. Every time we went to say goodbye, we would end up kissing again and delaying the inevitable even more.

"Yeah, I know" he said picking up his carry-on and suitcase.

I stared at the misplaced curls on his head from where my fingers had mussed them up and felt the urge to tell him that I loved him. It would be so easy to let it slip and to allow myself that moment of open honesty but I didn't know how he'd respond. Would he say it back? Would he run?

"Okay, I'll talk to you later" he said opening the door to the garage and walking out to his car.

Because he had picked me up last night and we had spent so much time prolonging his departure this morning, I was car-less and now had to wait for Vero to arrive and drive me back to my place. I made use of his empty house by showering and changing the sheets on his bed. Because he still hadn't decorated his house, he didn't bother with hiring someone to keep it clean either.

It wasn't that it was dirty, his Mom helped him out when she was around and he apparently made time for some of the cleaning himself but it was obviously a bachelor pad at the same time. He could probably use some groceries in his fridge too considering he had eggs, frozen chicken breasts, orange juice and half a lemon in there. Maybe this was why we usually opted to stay at my house.

When Vero finally arrived, I had showered, cleaned the bathroom, wiped up his kitchen and made a list of essential groceries that he needed if he wanted to eat anything besides scrambled eggs and lemon chicken when he was home.

When I closed the door behind me, the house smelled fresh again and lived in. Even if he didn't love me the way that I loved him, I wanted him to come home to a house that actually felt lived in. I wanted him to have a home.

****

As the next few days passed by, I busied myself with work and spending time with friends. Surprisingly, Sidney did call when he landed in Boston and continued to call throughout the week in random intervals. The Pens had been playing well and were on a hot streak. I wasn't going to complain because that meant that Sidney was not only calling, but also calling me when he was in a good mood.

Grumpy Sid and I didn't mix well from past experiences. He wanted someone to take his shit and I wouldn't let him. I valued what little time we actually had each day and if he wanted to be an ass to me during those few moments, then that was something that I just wasn't going to deal with.

Thankfully though, things had actually been going well. So well that when he arrived back tonight, I fully planned on surprising him with a homemade meal and dessert. I had texted Sid earlier asking when he would be back but didn't tell him what I was planning to do. By 5pm, I still hadn't heard back and while it was a little annoying, I had no idea what his schedule was like for the day and it was still possible that he was in-flight or dealing with the airport.

Taking my chances, I decided to leave the office for the weekend and head over to his house. I had plans to make something easy for dinner anyway in case he got held up and I had to keep the food warm for awhile.

Sid's POV:

Once we landed back in Pittsburgh, I was fully prepared to go home, fall face first into bed and tune out the world for the next 16 hours. I had turned my phone off while the plane was taxi-ing and for once in my life, didn't feel the need to turn it back on again. Whatever business or comment for the press that someone wanted could wait until tomorrow morning before practice.

"Yo, man!" I paused heading over to my car and saw a bunch of the guys crowding around Staalsy's car. "You coming out with us?"

It was after 9 and I paused wondering about Emma. Yeah, I wanted to see her but I hadn't talked to her since yesterday and it was a Friday night. She had probably made plans already with her friends anyway.

Even though I would rather be back at my place or her place and falling asleep right now, it was doubtful that she was actually waiting around for me. Why not bond a little with the guys for awhile?

"Yeah, man. I'm in."